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Why not build a friendship?

You're jealous of the friendship I've developed, after you choose to divorce me. I enjoy having a friend and will not allow your bitterness to destroy what she and I have developed. I am as uncomfortable with having a female friend, as it may be for you. This "friendship" thing is something I began exploring before you and I decided to attempt reconciliation.

I believe the relationship I share with her may allow me to mature, socially. I express concern for her well-being and care for her children. I listen to her, when all she needs is an ear and I don't pass judgment on her. We offer each other something which both of our minds and souls need. Our hearts belong to other people and I don't expect you to trust it. I'm willing to work toward a similar bond with you.

When you abruptly decided to have me removed from what I thought was our home, you betrayed me. If we ever were friends, that destroyed it. I am willing to risk myself again in pursuit of a united "us". Your focus seems to be on how and/or why I have a true friend, in someone else, rather than how you and I can rekindle.

I love you, but I don't like how you treat people or what you've done. Frankly, I don't need to be friends with you. We fuck, we live, and bills get paid. It would be nice to have something more going on, but I didn't have it with you before so, I'm fine as is. If we're unable to progress beyond our survival and sexual intimacy, maybe you'll give up on me. So be it.

You may be the woman in my life who will be my companion. It's like you have home field advantage or something. :) If your desire is moreso to “take me off the market” rather than truly be my partner and loyal to me, this isn't going to work. You've destroyed my establishment before and I'm not afraid of it happening again. I don't trust you and I'm at risk of your whim, regardless.

I'm not going to abandon my friend, as you've abandoned me. You shouldn't have done me how you did and I'm not like you, in that regard. If I did not love you, not only would I drop you like the piece of shit you've decided to resemble, but I wouldn't be investing myself trying to rebuild something with you. Grow up, stop pretending you're my friend, and let's get to work on this thing.

It may be difficult for you to deal with the fact that you are not my wife. You gave up that position and have to start from the ground floor, like any other stranger who I've happened to fuck. As far as I'm concerned, we just happen to know useless factoids about each other. That's all I have left from our previous dealings and I'm okay with that. You're not my wife and won't be again, if you can't be civil. Think about it.

Thoughts?

Posted by Refugee on 2007-10-21 15:08:07 | Rating:

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		wow...so just a thought, why are you trying to rekindle something you seem to be so angry about still? I'm sorry that she hurt you and definitly do not give up your friendships for anyone!! Friends are the best things we could ever have!!! Thanx for the comments on the crying bumbeling mess I was last night... : )
Posted by nikilynn1113 on 2007-10-21 16:47:48


		Hiya, hon. :) Great question and I'm glad to hear from you. I've only popped back on here for a moment, but I'll respond, when I have more time to express myself.
Posted by Refugee on 2007-10-21 17:47:51


		Wow! Just a little bitterness. That's ok. You earned it. It's yours to embrace, but don't think that it doesn't come across in your eyes when you look at this woman you are so called working it out with. Granted I understand. She did a bad thing, but something led up to that and most men never have a clue as to what that is. For example, a hundred years ago I asked my husband what he thought of our marriage. He replied that it was a damn good marriage. He then asked what I thought and my reply was that the marriage sucked. Life goes on; things don't change. I'm done with this marriage. Did a tarot reading with him and damn if it doesn't talk about that he's in trouble with his relationship. So that brings out communication and now he's trying really hard, but I'm not trying at all. AND that is when he brought it to the table. It can not be a one way street. It can not be one person trying to work it out. It HAS to be both of you working TOGETHER or it is bound to FAIL. The walls of defense that have been built must be taken down. You gotta put your self out there again. So, if you can't work together and bond, walk away now. You need some alone time and need to take a different road. On a side note: all relationships are built on trust and respect. If you don't have that, you don't have a realtionship.
Posted by Fracture on 2007-10-22 09:30:04


		Wow! Just a little bitterness. That's ok. You earned it. It's yours to embrace, but don't think that it doesn't come across in your eyes when you look at this woman you are so called working it out with. Granted I understand. She did a bad thing, but something led up to that and most men never have a clue as to what that is. For example, a hundred years ago I asked my husband what he thought of our marriage. He replied that it was a damn good marriage. He then asked what I thought and my reply was that the marriage sucked. Life goes on; things don't change. I'm done with this marriage. Did a tarot reading with him and damn if it doesn't talk about that he's in trouble with his relationship. So that brings out communication and now he's trying really hard, but I'm not trying at all. AND that is when he brought it to the table. It can not be a one way street. It can not be one person trying to work it out. It HAS to be both of you working TOGETHER or it is bound to FAIL. The walls of defense that have been built must be taken down. You gotta put your self out there again. So, if you can't work together and bond, walk away now. You need some alone time and need to take a different road. On a side note: all relationships are built on trust and respect. If you don't have that, you don't have a realtionship.
Posted by Fracture on 2007-10-22 09:40:08


		sorry for the duplicate comment. It just wasn't showing that it was going through and I hit refresh. Oops. Then again, you know how it is with dual personalities. I guess they both agreed on this topic or perhaps one didn't feel the other had done it right. Who knows with those two?
Posted by Fracture on 2007-10-22 10:25:50


		You know...this sounds like it will drive her crazy....in a good way. You sound so harsh....yet you were super alluring and strong. I liked it. I would let her read this...maybe she is. Teach her to mess with your heart. Like the ol' cliche'...'You do not know what you have, until it is gone. This is a very attractive attitude. I like this dominant arrogance about a man.
Posted by DifficultSoul on 2007-10-22 13:08:45


		I appreciate each and every person who has afforded time to read and/or present their perspective on what was/is on my mind. As I've eluded to, I will address specific and underlying thoughts which have been generated. My mind is elsewhere, right now, but I do look forward to further exploring this. Any and all are welcome to offer their insights, as my gerbil wheel continues to churn. Thanks. :)
Posted by Refugee on 2007-10-22 14:36:31


		wow, all I know is after reading what you wrote, I know it made you stronger and I dont even know you.
Posted by roe on 2007-12-08 20:46:20


		You express your anger in such an interesting way. I wish the best of luck to you in rekindling a friendship.
Posted by Jose007 on 2008-07-12 02:50:22