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| I Knocked, She Finally Answered
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All my life it's felt like my sister and me would never develop a close relationship. We are both very personal, private people and extremely sensitive. I finally have hope that all that may change:
Morgan was diagnosed with Diabetes when I was four years old and has never once let me ask her questions about it. She gets very upset and feels that I'm attacking her. Everything I know about it comes from personal research. It's always been very hard for me when she locks me out like that.
Everyone promised me that her being hospitalized again would help her open up, and help improve our relationship. I've only been to see her a few times in the past month but every time I went it seems she's getting worse and worse. I've been very upset about it.
But Saturday night she was allowed home to visit us for a few hours. She seemed happier than I've seen her in years. She was very nice to everyone and seemed really excited to be home. We made dinner, reunited her with her guini pig, and just had a great time talking. It just seemed so natural and right.
I've never been able to say that before, by the way.
At the end of the night we were all trying to ignore the fact that she had to go back. There were so many questions I had for her: Why did you do it to yourself? Are you better now? Is your health improving? Do you think about us a lot? Is your depression getting too out of hand? But of course I kept my mouth shut; just like I'd always trained myself to do.
Then she surprised me. Of course surprise isn't possibly a strong enough word to describe the feeling. She actually pulled me aside and asked me if I had any questions for her about anything that was going on. At first I was very on edge and tense, but it didn't take long for me to realize that she really meant it. For the first time in my life, my sister really opened up to me.
She told me about her frustration with life; how hard it was living with such a serious learning dissability. She explained that making herself sick was a way to control her life and our family. She also told me that she has been having problems with her memory ever since that first night in the hospital. The reason you would get diabetic keytoacidosis is because your body starts litterally eating your muscle, and it turns your blood acidic. When her blood went to her brain like that it might have caused some problems.
I feel so relieved. I know we're nowhere close to being out of the woods with our relationship right now, but I feel like we just crossed the longest and hardest stretch. I hope that as she's away longer and continues her counseling, she'll keep improving, and I'll get a chance to have the kind of sister that I've always longed for: a trusted best friend. |
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Posted by ReD_MooN on 2008-02-26 17:20:40 | Rating: | Views: 94
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I hope you two grow to be best friends.
I am glad to hear this good news sweetie.
Just goes to show, we should never give up hoping for good things.
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Posted by DifficultSoul
on 2008-02-27 01:22:06
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Red Moon, hold on to your belief. Stay in prayer, and know that with God, all things are possible.
Prayer changes all things. Keep the lines of communication open at all times. Even when it doesn't seem like you might be getting through to her, write your thoughts in a diary and some day she will be able to see just how much her sister loved her and missed her. Show your love even though she may not always understand. Continue to bond and become one. Nothing is greater then that sister to sister love. I know, because I have a sister that has MS. Has had it for more then 25 years now. In the past year her body had deteroated to the point that the doctors had given up on her and suggested that we put her in a hospic. We said no and went into a 30 day fasting and prayer. Now she is still with us and her condition has improved to the point that she is no longer on the danger list and the doctors are truly amazed. We all are and we are truly blessed. Your sister's condition can also change and in no time at all she could be back home with you. Stay in prayer, ask others to pray for her, show her much love and always be there for her. Hold on to your faith, and to God's unchanging hands. He is a God that is able to do all things but fail. Be strong, be encouraged and be blessed.
Much love,
Davis
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Posted by davistheblackeagle
on 2008-02-28 21:20:09
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DifficultSoul-
If I gave up wishing for good things, I wouldn't last another second in my life.
Thinking possitive and always trying to look to the future rather than living in the moment keeps me sane.
The future is so much easier to deal with :)
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Posted by ReD_MooN
on 2008-03-01 01:42:42
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davistheblackeagle-
I too know the miracle of blessings.
I was in a potentially fatal four-wheeler accident last spring and I believe that it was a blessing that saved my life.
Bringing God into the picture ensures that things turn out right. Maybe not always easy, but right.
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Posted by ReD_MooN
on 2008-03-01 01:44:35
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i have five sisters and relationships between sisters can be very complex,womens lives are so busy and emotional.i am so over joyed that you all have broken that wall,i know that the love between you is strong stay strong
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Posted by necronomincon
on 2008-03-04 16:31:47
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