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Question: Pastor K, how do you handle being single and sexuality? 
Well, being single to me and not this great curse or great lack in my life. I’ve been through a lot of relationships. Some
Of them were good and some were bad. Some of them the man was bad, SOME OF THEM I WAS BAD. But, I’m very
Satisfied with single hood. I stopped looking at other people and comparing their married lives to my single along time
ago. The older I get, the more I recognize exactly what mature balance is for my life. Some things, I just don’t’ have interest in anymore. This isn’t deep. It’s just a natural progression of maturing MENTALLY.
What makes ALL THE DIFFERENCE is knowing where I’m going in God. Is it time for me to fall in love? Maybe,
Maybe not. Is it the time for additional responsibility? I have to weigh those things as well. I have a very different outlook
on life than usual. I’m refreshed daily as more pieces of the puzzle come together. My focus is on building a WHOLE life, without bits and pieces spread out all over the place. I still date, but the anointing makes a difference. Sometimes I might like a guy, but my spirit just cringed when we’re together. Sometimes I don’t like him from the jump. Sometimes I’ll
Hear or see things prophetically while he;s talking. Then I make a decision based on what I hear God saying. Sometimes they can sense my greatness in God and walk away from me. The bottom line is, I WEIGH THE SPIRITUAL AND THE NATURAL ELEMENTS. I’ll pray about it and then wait. WAIT FOR WHAT?.....The exposure. Who he really is comes
to light. Then I can make a decision to keep going or let go. I have a pet peeve about wasting my time. I don’t like it.
So I let go or remain friends if possible.
As far as sexuality is concerned, I handle things moment by moment. I’m graced with a gift to handle the prophetic
office so I don’t think there’s a struggle like other people face. I may have a rough moment, but the next moment,
it’s gone and life goes on.
MORE THAN ANYTHING, I KNOW THERE’S A PENALTY TO PAY. I don’t want the penalty of a short
Satisfaction coming back to haunt me 5, 10 or 15 years from now. When I go back in my mind over some of the
Price I’ve paid in the past, IT’S AN AUTOMATIC TURN OFF! Just to think about the danger I put myself in, late night
Rendezvous, the pain of a broken heart, the depression, the silent trips to the doctor, the financial strain, the abortions..PLEASE! I just ain’t going through that again. It took too long for me to balance my life out again. It took too long to restore stability to the house. I LOVE MY CHILDREN TOO MUCH TO PUT THEM THROUGH DRAMA.
How selfish was that? For me to go out and make decisions that cost them headache and heartache as well. When I am suffering…they suffer. I learned that. And I refuse to repeat the cycle.
Nothing is going to rule me. Not money, people, insecurities, power, titles, kids, nor SEX DRIVE. Because once
Something rules you, you are not a servant to God anymore. You’re a slave to that desire. It will destroy you.
I don’t know about yall, but I want to be free and stay free. Stay free.
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Katrina, it sounds if though you have found inner peace with being in your own skin. Your last paragraph says it all, "nothing is going to rule me." Continue your walk with God, stay focus and I know you will reach the mountain top and bring many others alone with you which will be a blessed thing. Please stop by for a visit at my place and I will visit you and read your uplifting messages often.
Much love,
Davis
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Posted by davistheblackeagle
on 2008-02-20 18:22:04
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| Views: 120
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