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Yesterday (for the 1st time in almost a month) I had the chance to actually do something fun. Some of my friends decided to get together and do some good old pumpkin carving. I was so excited about having time to finally have time for something other than school work on the weekends. Pumpkin carving wasn't until 5pm so I met up with 2 other friends (1 of whom just had a bday on fri) at Finale's.
Anyway, I invited the 2 of them along to go pumpkin carving. We decided to split up -- me and Friend A going to shop for pumpkins while Friend B went home to get something. To make a long story short, I called Friend B after leaving the supermarket only to find her hysterically crying on the phone, sitting in a parking lot somewhere off the highway. Thankfully, Friend A and I were able to locate her. Friend B was totally balling in her car. The following hour to hour and a half consisted of listening to Friend B complaining about how much her life sucks and how unhappy she is. Her bf had broken up with her last Dec and she just doesn't seem to be able to move on. Instead she's so focused on the "why me" factor and how she hates her life right now. She has a high paying job, lots of friends, her own apt w/ decent roommates, enough $$ to invest in brand name everything.
I think it's OK to not be satisfied with life even if you have all the necessities. I always tell myself that I'm so lucky to have all the things I have. But that doesn't make me the happiest person in the world. As human beings we all ask for more than what we already have. We reach dreams and we immediately dream for something else. It's part of human nature. It's what drives us to be better people. It's OK to not be satisfied -- yet I don't think hysterically crying in a parking lot bitching about life is really the way to go.
At one point (doesn't matter how long it takes), we HAVE to let go of the past. By that I don't mean tucking it away and burying it and pray that you'll forget about it. We have to recognize that it's past tense, hold on to the good memories, and learn how to live life differently. It may take weeks, months, or even yrs. But eventually it becomes a learning experience and a part of what defines us. We just need to be patient.
Everyone is entitled to express their emotions freely. Perhaps if I were to cry hysterically in a parking lot, my tears won't be invisible to others. Only thing is, I tend to choose slightly more benign methods of expressing my feelings and coping with unhappiness.
One of my all time fav quotes:
"Maybe we're not supposed to be happy. Maybe gratitude has nothing to do with joy. Maybe being grateful means recognizing what you have for what it is. Appreciating small victories. Admiring the struggle it takes simply to be human. Maybe we're thankful for the familiar things we know. And maybe we're thankful for the things we'll never know. At the end of the day, the fact that we have the courage to still be standing is reason enough to celebrate."
Needless to say there was no pumping carving last night and I now have a huge pumpkin (which I don't know what the heck to do with) sitting in the kitchen. It's all good though because I couldn't be carving pumpkins while knowing that my friend was off somewhere crying her eyes out in a parking lot.
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Posted by Pegasaurus on 2007-10-21 14:53:54 | Rating: | Views: 81
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That part about letting go of the past is so true. The thing is it's definately easier said than does. Trust me I'm having some trouble of my own letting the past truely rest.
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Posted by Broken
on 2007-10-21 15:04:57
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Pegasaurus
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