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| Re-Invention |
There are times that come to us where what we are used to becomes the past and what is yet to be is unknown. These are times of change and it is our reactions to theses changes that give our lives a certain quality of pain and/or prosperity.
We can dread change, embrace it, or let it run its natural course while treading on top of it, but we can’t stop it. All situations are temporary. We change, our surroundings change, and everyone we encounter changes, so trying to hang onto something as elusive as the present is futile. When our situations are good we tend to want to keep them that way but even when they are bad it sometimes seems safer to hang onto what we have instead of facing the anxiety of an unknown future.
It’s hard to manage abrupt changes such as death and other situations that come with no warning. We really have to rely on our faith that everything will somehow turn out all right while we fumble through uncharted paths that have upset our secure presents, but we do have some control over situations that we know are coming to and end.
When we know that our temporary situations are coming to an end we are given the chance to re-invent ourselves to better handle what we know is coming. We might not know exactly what is coming but we do know that change is coming. We know when a baby is on the way, a parent is old and dying, a child is graduating and moving out, we are going to college or starting a new job, or even getting a new house. All of these situations and many more are changes that we can decide that we are going to change ourselves to fit the change coming. We can literally re-invent ourselves to meet the demands that change demands.
We don’t have to become something we’re not; we can simply emphasize some of our better characteristics that would make the changes easier and repress our less appealing and debilitating characteristics that makes the changes harder. We have all learned through past experiences which of our characteristics are the ones we need to leave behind and the more experiences we have the more we learn about our character. When changes come we actually have the chance to become a better person than we were before the change.
Sometimes we try to keep our worlds just as they are and we get into the situation where we have surrounded ourselves with people that “know” us. These people know us so well that it impedes our growth as people. We become pegged with certain characteristics that when we try to improve ourselves it comes off as phony to the people who “know” us so well. When change does come in these situations we have our loved ones reminding us of the person they know as us. They rob us of the chance to re-invent ourselves by imposing their image of us back into our psyche and this makes us dread change. We have to drag that same old person with all of his faults into our next situation.
I have had a lot of friends and loved ones throughout my existence. I used to try my best to hang onto people that I thought I couldn’t live without. I took a lot of abuse from people that I thought were my friends because my definition of friends included people I hung out with. I finally learned that all situations are temporary and all relationships are temporary because eventually death will come to claim us…all of us. I found that if someone doesn’t want me in their life the way or intensity that I want them in mine then my unhappiness is my own fault. Part of love is letting go and letting go is the foundation of self-love. We must be true to ourselves first and part of that truthfulness to ourselves must be the ability to make ourselves better. We owe it to ourselves and the people who actually love us to be able to make ourselves better people when we get the chance as change comes.
Change doesn’t have to be something that we fear. I know it would be nice to find ourselves in a good situation that never ends but that is not going to be a reality for anyone. The reality of it is everything changes. It’s a natural phenomenon that gives us the opportunity to re-invent ourselves. Change may not always make our lives better, but it is an opportunity to make ourselves better people if we choose to do so.
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Posted by Pauligan on 2008-11-29 10:30:51 | Rating: | Views: 151
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