Graduation did not bring me all I thought it was going to. I guess I imagined that after I graduated, somehow I would be free of all obligations, partying when ever I wanted, staying out late. Not so. As much as I am doing pretty much whatever I want, I still have those annoying obligations. I still feel like my mother is treating me like a child. I am nothing like a child. On the contrary, I am growing up very quickly I think. Not only am I already in college, but now I am paying some of my own bills, and I have been in a sucessful relationship for almost a year now. We haven't fought yet, but like people anticipate a storm, I am anticipating quit the storm named Kendall that will come ripping through my life. For some odd reason she still thinks that she is in control, it's been tap dancing on my last nerve really.
The idea of having to pay my own bills is quite the nuisance that is weighing on my mind. I have the money, but I am also the soul provider in my realationship. I am the only one right now with a job, so I feel alot of pressure because of that. I want to be able to go out, and give him everything he wants, but this money issue is always bothering me in the back of my mind.
Along with the money issue, my struggle with anorexia is always on my mnd. I am recovering from anorexia, and to be honest, most of the time I don't want to recover. The added money stress is only making not eating so much easier. I have so much pressure from my boyfriend to eat, he doesn't want me to slip since I have come so far, but I have gained weight and I am very upset about it. 
It's all just to much and I'm not sure what I am going to do. I know that the Bible says not to worry about tomorrow today has enough worries, and that I should give it to God, but sometimes it's hard to not think about it. I guess I should put it off for now. Think I'm stepping out for a smoke.

Thanks for reading.