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I, like many of the population, I'm sure, have been made fun of most of my life, by classmates, co-workers, loved ones, friends even. When someone such as a friend or family member does this, sometimes I would say, "That's mean" or "That hurts my feelings" they'd often just say, "I was trying to be funny, just joking around, sheesh." That's the problem, though, when we are "just joking around" it's generally in relation to something that we know the person is sensitive about, that's why it's funny, right? I mean, I've also heard like psychologists talk about this, they say that when someone makes fun of someone, say, for being fat, then say I was just joking, no, they weren't completely, there was some truth in there to the person saying it, either they think it or they think that the other person thinks about it, that's why it hurts, you know that the person is saying it because you are sensitive about it.
In my case there were always a few things that the people close to me would make fun of me about, my parents and my brother being the first to try to get my goat. My mom started it I think with calling me thunder tighs, I was probably about six or so and sure, I was chunky, but she was my damn mom and she was a tubbo herself, didn't she think that it would hurt me? My mom is and was not a horrible person, but she definitely put her needs before ours often, especially in public, she wanted to be the center of attention, so if she was with me in public I became her source for many a punch-line. Your home, or at least your parents, need to be a safe zone, sure, there can be a little gentle ribbing, you don't need to coddle, but you need to figure out what your kids might be more sensitive about and just be careful in those areas. It really sucked when I started my relationship last year, my brother who was always my best friend really started making fun of me about how my relationship would be like, what my man must be like, he'd always made fun of me, but he'd had bad rekationships and just couldn't stand to see me happy, it ultimately made us enemies, we haven't spoken in six months now. Like when I would tell my brother that Nathan said something nice to me, he would say something like, "Well, he must be gay or something." Or if I would call Nathan just after a date with him my brother would say something like, "He's gonna get sick of you way sooner if you don't leave him alone." Luckily I didn't heed this advice because Nathan loved hearing from me and still loves being with me, I just wish that my brother had stopped making fun of me, I tried to tell him that it hurt me, but he would get mad and say that he was just being funny and that I was too sensitive, but couldn't he understand that I didn't think that it was funny, shouldn't that be enough?
So, I basically wrote this because I just think that we really need to think about the other person's feelings before we start, "just joking" they might not find it so funny, and hey, think about why you are doing it, probably to forget about your own shortcomings, why don't you work on bettering yourself and not making someone else feel bad.
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Posted by Nerdnutt on 2008-02-16 12:45:28 | Rating: | Views: 90
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That has to be one of the most hateful families I have ever seen:P Mom calling you thunder thighs at 6?? Oh, id slap her so hard. No respect yet they expect us to respect them? No way. She went too far.
Yes, granted, a fire sign will say things a water sign take a lil hard and the fire sign chalks it up to "just teasing". But, there should be a limit and a right time. When someone is feeling down or looking like an easy mark, you dont kick them from behind or in the gut. Just rude. You tell those jokes about you being fat when you are in a silly mood and both of you are fooling around. Fair play.
Center of attention while you were the punchline?? No, don't defend her, she was a real BITCH! I cannot believe this! I would hate her so much! If my mom did that, she would feel such a wrath. I dont care if she is the parent. So SO rude!
It'd be different if she jabbed you a lil and then made up for it by sharing some fun with you...maybe. But, it seems she was very selfish and ridiculous.
And, if I met your brother, I'd give him a piece of my mind and fist too. My brother has some of the same drunken nerve yet comes back later sensitive as a wounded lamb. He is a confusing mess but has hurt me enough that I don't trust him much. I hate being on guard so much and not feeling the love/support I desire.
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Posted by brainstormer
on 2008-02-16 19:59:44
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i wish i could give you a hug right now. here, lets try hug....hug....hug...thats the best i can do. you are a wonderful person. don't ever let anyone take that from you. :)
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Posted by lastblastkl
on 2008-02-16 22:34:26
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