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| Lost Boys With Broken Radars
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First of all, all straight men have a radar. The radar is an amazing, built-in sixith sense that detects attractive females. The female is then subconsiously rated on a scale of 1 to 10 according to personal tastes in women and then sometimes blurted out to the nearest male. Attractive women know exactly what I'm talking about. An intense, searching gaze followed by a judgemental stare and then a snyde remark whispered to another dude. It's just the way it is. Fuck me for being honest, right?
My radar and subconsious rater were broken about three years ago. I remember when the radar first started malfunctioning. As time and deprivation pass, the worse it gets. After the first few weeks of basic training, the slightest thing set me off along with every one of my co-workers. The tiniest hint of purfume on the wind, a girlish, high-pitched laugh in the distance, the tok tok tok of heels somewhere down a hall. All conversations ceased and everyone grew silent. Our heads would swivel until someone caught sight and gave a direction, distance and description. We weren't just sensing attractive females, but all females. Bleh... It was weird and depressing. We were that deprived. Our fantastic sixth sense was indeed busted.
In Iraq, not only were we picking up everything on radar but our raters were off anywhere from 1-4 (way fucking off, there should be no room for error).
"Yo, check her out, an 8 for sure, but back home a 5 at best..."
It made me sad to here this and similar comments on a daily basis.
This continued on to Alaska. Off anywhere from 1-3 (Not much better than Iraq, nobody refered to Alaska as back home).
My single comrades and I live a sad, sorry, deprived life. Most of us volunteered to spend our sexual peaks masturbating in foxholes, guard towers and toilet stalls. Fuck us right? We're just a bunch of creeps, anyway.
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Posted by NNTS86 on 2007-12-26 21:39:49 | Rating: | Views: 61
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This made me laugh. I have many military friends and I shared this with a few of the single ones. They enjoyed it, but made sure to tell me that it is all true! I hope one day your radar is fixed! Good luck on that one, hun! Nice post!
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Posted by MissAnonymous
on 2007-12-26 21:48:55
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I like the way that you make a statement..xox
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Posted by caliope
on 2007-12-27 20:44:46
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