I'm in a shitty mood, I've been having one of the crappiest weeks I've had in a long long time, so I decided to make a new blog, ha.

I suppose I should start the story from the start...
I met her at a movie night, one of my best friends took me because he didn't know very many people there.
We really hit it off, she was sitting on my lap for a while during it, and we had so much in common.
I walked her home in the morning, and got her number, and we talked and talked over the phone a lot.
She had to go to Tasmainia at the end of the week, and I could only see her for about half an hour the day she left, so that really sucked, but none-the-less, we still talked over the phone, and a bit on msn.
The first road block, is that I drink, she didn't know that, until I told her about a week after she left, she immediately said she couldn't be with someone who drinks, and I, of course immediately quit, because I had this crazy idea that she could be so damn important to me, and so ever-lasting that I'd do anything for her.
She took me back, and I thought it had us at a better point than before because of sacrafice, albeit on something small.
About two days later, I officially asked her out, because we realised I hadn't. (She said yes)
Another couple days after that, she dumped me, because she said she didn't know me well enough.
Which set me off on this, I've always thought a relationship is the best way to get to know someone you like, doesn't that make sense to anyone else?
We didn't talk for a little while, until she told me she was going to a party later that night, it was quite obvious people would drink (obvious to me anyway, but she went)
She then started complaining that she was the only sober one, and that she was having a bad time.
I told her to fuck off, because she had made me depressed.
She told me that she didn't break up with me because she doesn't like me, but that because she didn't know me.
We started talking again.
Still went on until she came back, and I asked if I could see her.
She was busy until Monday, I said we should see a movie or something, I was pretty excited.
I went away for a weekend, but I couldn't tell her because it was last minute, and there was no reception at where we were, which happened to be one of my ex's house.
This wasn't the best choice for me... Because I still have strong feelings for her, but she's into this stupid arsehole who'll never work out for her, which is another thing that seems plainly obvious to me, but everybody else is oblivious.
I thought we were coming back on Sunday... Turns out we wouldn't get back until late Monday, so I missed out on the date.
She didn't seem to notice we even had plans.
We were still talking lots, but with one exception, I wanted to see her, but she was always busy.
She went away the next weekend.
When she came back, she was still too busy to even see me.
I finally caved in, and asked her if she even wanted to go out with me, she said no.
The next day, my friend (who introduced me to her in the first place) went to the Australia Day Practice Concert, and when he came back, he tells me he was flirting a lot with a girl, I asked her who, but he wouldn't tell me, but something about the way he said it, just bugged me.
Now we're up to yesterday, and she tells me she had fun at the Pratice Concert with my friend, and that it was "...interesting"
I knew.
I asked her why it was interesting, she wouldn't tell me.
I ran out of credit on my phone.
This put me into one of the worst moods of my life, I'm still literally shaking with rage.
Now today, I've finally confronted my 'friend', and he told me, mainly because I told him I knew already.
Now they're going out...
I really think that I'm going to try and kill myself again...
I'm so sick of being betrayed and strought out by every woman I've ever had these sort of feelings for.
My life has just been so shitty lately... And I think this is going to send me over the edge.

So, first and maybe last post...
Great.