Well today was my first shift at work for two weeks after a nice bit of annual leave, which was boring to be honest I did very little work using the excuse that it was nearly christmas.
anyway havent spoken to her for a few days, she gave me a hug on saturday after I dropped the kids off but i feel as though I do all the effort in phoning her and stuff, but they I guess she is still in a place where she doesnt know what she wants, and although I know I want her back I cant help listening to my friends and they all say I would be mad to get back with her after what she has done, you know the whole taking my kids and running off with another bloke who is like 12 years older than her, but in all honesty when I look at her I cant help but forget that.
I bought her a really nice writing pad for xmas as I hope it helps her taking notes during her course and I wrote a really nice message in it, so im going to give it to her on the saturday after xmas as she mentioned going for a drink or dinner which would be absolutely fantastic, but I will not get my hopes up too much cos im pretty sure she will cancel cos of him, I hate this man so much I no its bad but I want to tell him so much what has been going on between us, I know its childish but it would be my little bit of revenge!!!
I really hope that I have a good christmas im working a lot and that really sucks and gets me down, im working a night shift on new years eve, but then again I think thats probably a good thing as at least I wont feel like killing myself while im at work, or maybe i will lol work can be pretty depressing and stressful.
I really hope that everything in my life is going to work out for the new year I mean 2007 is a chapter in my life I would like to quickly forget, I have read a lot of blogs from people that are going to commit suicide at midnight on the 1/1/08 I sometimes wonder if thats what is in store for me in the next year, cos god knows I have come close to it so many times but I never quite manage to go through with it, I just dont think im that low right now.
Posted by MrMoon on 2007-12-23 18:07:55 | Rating: n/a | Views: 93
Mr. Moon, goodnight and Precious greetings in the wonderful name of Jesus Christ, our Savior and friend and the one whose birthday we are celebrating at this time. I know what you are feeling because I have had my share of hurt in this life but no pain is worth taking your life for. It is true that you wish that there was a magic portion that you could take to help you forget, but there is none, not that I know of. Believe me when I tell you that God is there for you and will help you when you call on Him. No I am not just trying to give you religion, if you are thinking that way, I don't know but I am just letting you know He is real. Anyway try not to spend a lot of your time and energy thinking about the situation, it is not good for your health physically, mentally not spiritually. If the woman was in love with you you would not have to ask her to have a relationship with you she would be there always so don't keep going after her all the time, there are so many other women out there who would genuinely love you if you let them. Thank God that you are able to spend time with your children and cherish the time that you have with them let them be a very important part of your life. Do not hate the man in her life nor try to do him harm, believe me it is not worth it, I don't think he took her against her will. Move on with your life and don't let this woman use you, enjoy the life God has given you and don't consider suicide because in later years as time gets better you will be happy you kept the breath of life God give you. Ask Him to keep you to watch your children grow. And remember there is always good in the worse situations so look for the good in yours. Ponder this thought as I share it with you. "Come smell the beautiful roses, The roses have thorns and the thorns have rose too, Only Christ could give us that beautiful scent that comes with the roses true, Only He could help us to bear it when the roses prick, Only He could heal those very painful stick. Hope my little blog helps you. God's blessings now and always. SWEETHEART
