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I have received a few comments asking why i broke up with my boyfriend if i say he is such a nice guy and that i love him.
Its hard to explain but im going to try.
I still love him, but not the way i used to. I shared 3 years of my life with this wonderful caring person and we did so much together, so much history. He was my best friend and confidant. I dont think yo ucan automatically switch your feelings off just because you have decided you dont want to be with that person any more.
While we got along most of the time and hardly argued, it came to a point where when we did argue it was always about the same thing.
The lack of affection in general and the lack of physical intimacy in the bedroom.
He would always say that he knew he was neglecting me and he knew he needed to be more affectionate but i never saw anything. Things would be awesome for a week or a month then slowly go back to normal.
I got sick of always being the one to intiate a hug or kiss, or sex, even a simply holding hands.
He could never give a reason why he didnt do any of that stuff, always just a promise to be better, an empty promise it would turn out.
He begged me not to leave him, which annoyed me. Why should it have to get to the point of me breaking up with him before he actually realised something had to change?
I felt like if this was the problem we were having now then it will always be this problem, no matter how hard we tried, we just wernt compatible, even thought socially we got along famously.
He said that he sometimes used to get nervous because while im 11 years younger then him, i have alot more experience with the opposite sex (he used to have a weight issue but lost like 80kg so never really had many girlfriends)
I miss him heaps but im sure that it will get easier. I thinks its because im so used to coming home and him being here, just having him around for company and a chat. I come home now and its lonely, but as time goes on it will get easier. I know he is still struggling, he has msged me a fair bit, trying to hold on.
He hates staying at his sisters and wants to come home, he misses my family coz they were his family too.
He asked me if i wanted to go out for dinner with him this weekend, apparantly with no alteria motive, but im not sure, i think its too soon and i dont want to give him any false hope.
Have you ever been worried that when your in a relationship for so long that one day you'll wake up and suddenly you'll have run out of conversation?
You hear about it all the time with married couples, they realise that all they talk about is work or the kids.
Thats what kind of happened, all the conversation revolved around work or family. I mean what else was there to talk about, we knew each other inside out so there was no point talking about interests.
I sent his mum an email just saying sorry and thanks for welcoming me into the family. Apparantloy she was really upset and reallyh appreciated the email, and here i have been thinking for 3 years that she didnt like me because i "stole" her only son.
But im feeling really good, really happy. Getting sick of everyone thinking im going to fall to pieces. I'm dealing with this one day at a time and i know it will get easier, this isnt my first break up.
Keeping Strong,
Peace xoxo
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I completely understand everything you are going through....for the past month I have been going through a break-up with a guy I dated for almost 4 years.
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Posted by nakedtruth
on 2008-02-05 02:26:50
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| Views: 89
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