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what's on my mind

I'm just sitting in my room thinking about all the drama that has happen in my family on my mom side of the family and it's hard to deal with and think about if you know what i'm talking about and everything. I really don't know why things happen but most of the time you just have to deal with it and hople that the people that you hurt will for give you and shit like that and everything. I really think to get my thoughts out there because it makes me feel good if you know what i'm talking about. I know that if it was me i would be mad but i don't think i would go out and hurt someone because that would be wrong in my book. I look at what life has to give and it's something you don't want to regret that you have.

My heart goes out to the mother of the son who lost his life and that is my aunt barb. I've had not seen her yet but i know that she needs to hold on and think about the good momorys that she has of her son chris and everything. I'm hoping that things will get better and everyone will look on life and hope that everything is going to be alright because that is what i really want is pace in this world and shit. Because the more i think about this the more i start to wonder what if that was me and i did what my cousin tony did i would be in the same trouble as tony is and everything. That is the stuff that i really think about and it goes through my mind alot and i just know it's not my fault but i just want to be there you know and study everything that goes on in this screw up world.

I'm just happy to know that i have someone i can spill my guts to and it's the good feeling i get and everything. I really don't want to lose him because he means the world to me and he has help me through this pain and it's wonderful if you ask me. I could not ask for anything better because he is always there and it's nice to know that you have someone you're heart belongs to and that is something i'm never going to let go. I really love talking to him on the phone and he makes me feel like i'm special and he treats me like i'm a queen and it's the best feeling because i've never felt like this and i'm never going to let all go because in my own words i'll be a fool if i let this one go and eveything.

Tomrrow is me and john one week annniversary and i'm very happy that we are together because he makes all my dreams come true and that is the best feeling and everything. And is the best boyfriend to me and very sweet and loving and kind and caring and sexy if you ask me and everything. I can't get enough of him and i just want stay home and talk to him on the phone on our anniversary and that is the plan if i don't have anything else to do if you know what i'm talking about. I just don't want to lose something that is right there in front of me and everything. I'm very happy and i don't think it's going to go away anytime soon. He just knows when i'm mad when i'm sad and when i'm just trying to be me and he loves me for me and that is all i can really ask for you know.

Today i'm going to be spending time with my grandma. We are going to the movies like we always do and it's going to be a blast and everything. But i always have fun with my grandma because she makes me laugh and we love hanging out together and everything. I'm just happy to have great life and i don't know why i was being so selfish about not having everything in life but i do have a wondering boyfriend who i love and want to spend the rest of my life with and a great family who is always there for me and eveyrthing.

Well i'm going to end this here, But i'll keep you all updatd on how things are going with me and my relationship bye for now.

Posted by Michigan_State_Gurl_25 on 2007-12-13 19:46:46 | Rating: