I'm just in my room watching tv and thinking about how i don't want to go to the doctor tonight because i'm totally fucking not looking forward to it and everything. I really think that the doctor is going to fucking bitch at me and i'm not going to fucking listen because it's going to go in one ear and out the other ear if you know what i'm talking about. I'm just hanging out in my room because i'm totally fucking bored and i'm not sure on what i want to do and everything and my head is starting to hurt but it's going to be alright through.

I was watching the redwings play against the stars but then i can back to my room to watch my own and everything. I just can't believe that the pro hockey in the play off and i'm hoping that we are going to win the game tonight so we go to final round and everything. I really love hockey and i can't believe it's almost over and everything. Then the college football is going to be back and i'm so fucking happy about that if you know what i'm talking about. I'm just so happy to have some fun and i'm hoping to go to other hockey game. But I'm just hoping that i can take my friends and family with me if you know.

I've have been doing thinking and it's starting to make my head hurt and i just don't know what i want to do anymore and i can't find the words i want to say you know. I just don't want to lose what i'm feeling at the time that i am feeling it and i'm not sure if i can handle all the fucking pressure and i'm hoping that i can hold on in here and know that i can handle all the fucking excess baggage that comes with relationships and stuff like that if you know what i'm talking about and everything. I just don't know what i'm going to do and think because right now i'm totally mess up in the head and i need to forgive my past relationships but really don't think i can because it's not worth it anymore. I'm just hoping that things are going to be alright and i won't have to go on thinking that i did the wrong thing and i really don't want to go on with this life that is hunting me right now.

I really don't know if i can forgive all the people that hurt me in this past year and everything if you know what i'm talking about. I'm not sure on how i'm going to handle all the fucking things that go on in the back of my mind and i'm just hoping that things are going to be a lot more better once i find out what is really going on. I just don't think things are going to fucking go the way that i really want them to you know. I just don't think that things are going to work on things that are totally fucking borthing me and i'm not going to go down for it and everything because that is how i feel about it. I need to get away from my past that i don't want to even fucking want to think about if you all know what i'm talking about and everything. I just don't think things are going to turn myway and everything if you know what i'm talking about and everything.

I'm not sure if i can go on with the pain that i have in my heart and i'm hoping that i can move on from the pain that i have in my heart and soul and i'm hopefully have to not think about things that are going to be hurting me in the long run and everything. I'm thinking that things are going to be okay i have faith in myself and i'm not going to worry about all the fucking drama in my life and everything that comes with it.

Well, Everyone I'm going to end this here for tonight, I'm going to keep you all updated on how things are going with me. So pace out everyone bye for now.