Well, Last Night was totally fucking awesome because once again i got to hang out with my cousin tony and his friend jeremy and it was totally fucking cool and everything. I had a really good time and i just can't forget about it and i'm always going to think about my time i shared with him and everything and i'm totally going to love it and everything. I can't wait for them to come over and hang out with me because that will be totally cool if you ask me.

I feel like i can talk to tony and jeremy about anything and i'm hoping that things are going to be a lot better for me because then i won't have to worry about things and i'm hoping that i can get over my fear of loving again because i can't get hurt again you know what i mean and everything. I'm just hoping that me and jeremy have a chance to go out and have some fun because he totally needs it and i'm hoping that i can be the one that goes with him and stuff like that and everything if you know what i'm talking about. But i know now that things are going to be okay because i have to believe in my self to make things and my problems go away and everything. But i know in my heart that is going to be okay and i know that i have to have my own life when it comes to things.

I'm just totally fucking scared about things and i know that i can't always trust my own feelings that i have in my heart and soul and i can't seem to think anything. I just need to go away and think about all the good things in life and not all the bad things if you know what i'm really talking about. I can't worry about every little damn thing because i'm totally fucking wondering about my own life and i can't seem to think it's going to be alright because i'm totally fucking wrong about it and everything. I'm just trying to think about things that really mean something to me and i can't understand my own life.

Do you ever feel like you don't understand you're own life and you just wish things would be normal but they are not because of things that turn out to be alright. I'm just totally fucking wanting to be who i am and i'm not going to let someone tell me that i' not pretty and that i'm ugly and i'm not that good looking well i'm telling you something i have the most pretty blue eyes you will ever see and they make guys melt all the fucking time. I have been told that and i'm just trying to happy for once i can't seem to shake it off.

Well, Everyone I'm going to end this here tonight, I'll keep you all updated on how things are going with me and my life, So pace out everyonebye for now.