Why can't life be a dream? why can't my reality be altered? why can't i live in a world that allows me to drive my car with my eyes closed and walk up stairs backwards.  why can't i walk up to the girl at the coffee shop and confess my love to her, then proceed to teleport immediately to a wedding service followed closely by a direct flight to a beach whose water is filled with swimming wonderfuls. wonderfuls are creatures that rub your back and overtake your mind with an intense euphoria the likes of which can only be matched with hard drugs.  why cant i listen to the t.v. on mute and have it not bother me that i don't know what is being said? why can't i ride my five pound dog to work? is there a truly legitimate reason that i am not allowed sing all of my speech, even in the most ludicrous situations that do not call for singing?  why can't i drive a muscle car at high speeds after ingesting numerous alcoholic drinks and several unlabeled prescription pills? it really is quite fun.  i want to roller skate across the water to an island filled with little people who sing me songs and tell me im extremely good looking.  i want to meet a woman who judges me strictly on sexual performance and is not at all interested in my intellectual abilities.  i want to give hugs mid-conversation, right when they're least expecting it.  i want to see mysterious creatures hiding behind lamp-posts on my way to class, all the while being completely unvulnerable.  i want to wake up looking at the clouds and seeing shooting stars in the middle of the day.  i want to see through women's clothes and make my parents obey my every command (perhaps the most far-fetched idea that has ever drifted through my mind). i want to be praised for marijuana use and to see people castrated for kindness.  i want her to be with me but it seems impossible.