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Angelo's here again. He's very tired, he's been up pretty much the last thirty-six, trying to unsnarl a massive computer headache at his job. "I don't think you can count Romney out," he says.
"I don't think so, either. But, it doesn't really look good for him right now."
All of a sudden, there's a hustle and a bustle, and like whirlwind, Phyllis Pye, Phyllis The Bushie, is among us, pompadour touching the ceiling, aviators askew, clutching an edition of The American Spectator. She looks like a forty-five plus Amy Winehouse NOT on drugs. "Hello, Liberals!" she screeches. "And, what subversion are you plotting today?"
I sigh. I turn to Angelo, and remark, in the same tone of voice I've been using all night, "actually, I wonder if the Republican ascendancy just might really be over and done with."
"Don't hold your breath," Phyllis barks.
"Unlike the last one, the elements are different now."
"Last one?" Angelo asks.
"We'll always be in the ascendancy," Phyllis grunts, "because we're God-fearing, and you're not!"
"Yes. The period between Lincoln, and Herbert Hoover. Seventy plus years." I fork out a pat of margarine, and put it in my wheat porridge. "In the years after the Civil War, the Democratic party was mud here in the north for the stigma of starting the Civil War in the first place. Also, it was stigmatized by being the party of the Catholics and the Irish in particular. There were only two Democrats in the White House in between Lincoln and Hoover. Grover Cleveland, with two separate four year terms, and Woodrow Wilson, who was only elected in the first place because of the third party Bull Moose split in 1912."
"Why did it go on for so long?" Angelo inquires.
"Because America knew what it was doing!" Phyllis stabs.
"I have a theory." I put Sweet 'n Low in my porridge. "I think it was because the only people voting were White males. The Black vote in the north, which went Republican anyway, was incredibly small in those years, and we're not considering their disenfranchisement in the south by Dixie Democrats. In the industrial north and west, the GOP ruled. Women didn't get the vote until 1920. If the electorate were more diverse, maybe it would've been different."
"That's right," Phyllis points. "Women vote for Liberals. You can't have that! Ann Coulter is right!"
"Today, you have a much more diverse electorate. I think it's gonna be a while before you shake the American people of the two party thing, though."
"Ann Coulter!" shrieks Phyllis. "Ann Coulter, Ann Coulter, Ann Coulter!"
"They keep talking about Ronald Reagan," Angelo says.
"Who does?"
"McCain and Romney and anyone there trying to still the crowd."
"Now, there was a President!", says Phyllis proudly.
The porridge is sublime tonight. "This is really a strange place. I could actually see how all the mythological things in the history books in school came about."
"Really?"
"It's like, Reagan's venerated a lot more for the things he stood for than for what he actually did. It's like, what he actually did is really of no account, it's the myth that truly matters. You and I, we both know of concrete things, we got a substantial increase in the standard of living and an actual real pay raise. The Reagan Administration was the first to actually do something for service people in who knows how many years, but, for the most part, there were so many negatives on the domestic front-"
"How DARE you impugn the name of Ronald Reagan!" There's a wild look in Phyllis' eyes. "But then, you'd expect that from the likes of YOU!"
"Meanwhile, Bush has raped both veterans and the current team on the field. Mission accomplished."
"Treason!" Phyllis' voice is about to raise the roof. "Treason! Treason!"
Dawn rushes down the counter. "Phyllis, if you don't shut the hell up, I'm gonna call the police, do you understand?"
Phyllis is about to respond; she catches herself, and pipes down. All other eyes in the place are upon her, like they would be on the baboon in the cage at the zoo, who's flinging his fecal matter at the observing patrons.
"McCain will probably pull out Super Tuesday," Angelo says, his voice cracking from fatigue.
"Hey, it might go that way. He's got the momentum. It's hard to see the GOP Powerfuckers getting behind him, though. They don't trust him any more than they trust Ron Paul."
Angelo clears his throat. "If he starts raising money on a big time scale, though, they have to. It's money that talks. Romney only has so much."
Dawn pours more coffee for me. "How are you tonight?"
"Oh, I'm okay. Nice, quiet night. Should be a nice, quiet weekend."
Dawn smiles, and gently bites her lip. A few stools down, Phyllis pointedly reads her issue of The American Spectator.
"How are Rob and the boys?
"Boys are fine. Abbie asks about you."
I smile. "Tell him I said hi."
"Rob's got a never ending fight going on for bennies he should be getting but ain't." Of course, bringing this argument up with some people encompasses Treason.
"Yep. It's the rewards of defending your Country."
I look toward Angelo, for a comment in agreement. However, his head's now down on the counter, wet from where Dawn's rag had wiped up only seconds before. He sleeps peacefully. Dawn looks about nervously.
"Don't worry. He needs a power nap. He'll probably be up all night fixing the computer at work. I'm surprised his cell hasn't rung in the past ten minutes."
I look over to see that Phyllis has departed. This proves my theory: engaging with Lunacy only legitimizes it, and eventually brings you down to it's level. Ignore it, and it becomes the tree in the forest that falls when no one's there. I know the theory does have its holes; however, in the gloaming of a very, very early Saturday morning, it seems to have held water.
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Posted by Knoxxie03 on 2008-02-02 08:43:30 | Rating: | Views: 64
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Anybody would be an improvement over Dubya... including Tyler..
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Posted by crydun2004
on 2008-02-02 13:18:00
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At least Tyler would give a more coherent State Of The Union address.
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Posted by Knoxxie03
on 2008-02-02 18:01:07
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I find the US system of selecting presidential candidates quite confusing but interesting. Out of curiousity, are these people you write about actual persons or fictional?
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Posted by hairytoad2005
on 2008-02-03 04:31:36
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I personally think the election process is WAY too long here...but I think the higher the stakes, the longer it goes. After all, the American people need an alternative to the activities of Britney Spears 24/7.
All of these characters I mention (with two exceptions, by the way) not only exist, but prosper, in my alternate universe... :D
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Posted by Knoxxie03
on 2008-02-03 07:04:49
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At least you have a little certainty about when your elections are going to be.. we have a minority parliament here in Canada which could fall and result in an election at any moment. Which has both its good and bad points.
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Posted by hairytoad2005
on 2008-02-03 08:03:48
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