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Angelo Covelli, my old bud here, is voting for John McCain. He's an ex-serviceman like me. He's, shall we say, voting his BDUs.
"I can't understand why anyone would vote for Romney," Angelo comments, sticking three steak fries on his fork. "For starters, he's got the personality of a shoe tree."
Harland Woods, sitting two stools down from him, giggles.
"You know what the problem is?" I ask.
"What?" Angelo answers.
"He's purely reactive. He never really initiates things. Look back on this campaign. Everything he's done was a reaction. All of his flip-flops, all of his attempts to be all things to all people." I pour Sweet 'n Low into my coffee. "The only thing keeping him going's the right wingers with clothespins stuck on their noses."
Angelo sighs. "You're right."
"And, they wanna vote for him like they all want enemas."
"Meanwhile," Harland says, "I'm voting for Ron Paul."
I look at Harland, in genuine surprise. Angelo laughs. "You mean, you're NOT voting for Romney?"
"Did you think everyone associated with LDS would vote Romney?" Harland asks.
"Well, I figured 99% would suffice," Angelo replies.
"I think Ron Paul pretty much speaks for me," Harland says. He's enjoying a oatmeal raisin muffin. "I've always had a Libertarian bent anyway."
"It's a great statement to make," I say.
Angelo sighs. "I know the RNC thinks he's a dangerous crackpot."
I smile. "I liked how last night, McCain stuck it to Romney about newspaper endorsements."
"Yeah, that was funny," Angelo says. "Mitt gave him that patented, unoriginal crap about how being endorsed by the New York Times indicates how strong a Conservative he is. And then McCain fires back that Romney's hometown Boston papers endorsed him, and that he's pretty sure the Arizona Republic will as well."
"How 'bout Mitt's speech the other night?" I'm enjoying a sinfully delicious cup of mint chocolate chip ice cream. "He said we're facing unprecedented competition from other countries, like Asia and India."
"Well," Angelo replies, "someone's gotta say stupid Bushisms after Bush is gone."
"You know what I can't believe?" This ice cream is incredible! "I can't believe Huckabee struck out with the religious Right in Florida."
"They don't think he can win." Angelo sips a large glass of Sprite.
"Yeah, but he's all they have. You know those people won't vote for Romney, and if they didn't serve in the armed forces, they're not inclined to vote for McCain."
Cookie saunters down the counter, to check on things. "So, what are you all talking about tonight?"
"Politics," Harland says.
"Oh, Lord, you're not voting for Hillary, are ya?"
"Hell no," Angelo barks.
"That's good." Cookie refills my coffee. "I was worried about you."
"The way I look at it," I remark, "a vote for Hillary gets split three ways. For her, for him, and for the next version of Monica Lewinsky, whoever that may be."
Angelo smiles. Cookie clears her throat.
"Look, can any of you imagine just what a presidency with the first spouse being Bill Clinton would actually be like? My God, stop and think about this. The government would grind to a halt just because of his shenanigans. We can't have this. We can't have these people up there anymore. They've got to go. The Bushes and the Clintons have all got to go."
Cookie grins. "Barack, is it?"
"Damn right. I'm voting Barack. No matter what. If I gotta write him in next November, I will."
"I know you," Cookies quips, facing Angelo. "You're voting for Mitt the Gitt."
"I am not!"
"He's a bloody gitt in hairspray and botox, he is. A fine president he'll make, if only 'cuz he's an improvement on the idiot son."
"My cat would be an improvement over him," I interject.
"And what kind of name is Mitt anyway?" she asks.
"I don't know." I watch as Angelo spears seven or eight fries on that one little fork. "I know his first name's really Willard."
"Willard." Cookie looks up dreamily. "A movie about a man who collects rats as pets."
"In a nutshell, yes." I smile, Angelo laughs.
"A fine American candidate. Mitt the Rat."
"As opposed to Mitt the Gitt."
"Yes, George."
Life is indeed ridiculous. I watch Angelo stuff all those French Fries into the hole , there in his face. I eye Cookie, and her bright, wondrous red hair. I look at my bowl, the one that so recently had featured chocolate chip mint ice cream, and sigh. Is there anything out there that can match all of this?
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Posted by Knoxxie03 on 2008-01-31 21:26:01 | Rating: | Views: 63
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greatn and the best one on the pres scene. Romney is good for one thing shoveling pig shit. Hill well like her husband a liar. Maybe she has had a fling with a younger guy. McCain all the way
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Posted by norm4u2
on 2008-01-31 21:48:36
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I'm trying to imagine just what kind of younger man would have a fling with Hillary...he'd be a very interesting case study!
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Posted by Knoxxie03
on 2008-02-02 07:38:24
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interesting story. I'm backing Hillary myself. She's organized, put together and speaks like a true candidate should.
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Posted by crydun2004
on 2008-02-02 13:14:55
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