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| All's fair in love and war....or is it?
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All relationships have their up and downs, good times and bad times. There are no *perfect* people out there. In all relationships, there will be a fight, argument and more. And to have a successfull relationship you have to work through those times, learn to cooperate with eachother in order for it to work. But at what point do the bad times and arguments outnumber the good times. When should you call it quits, accept the fact the person you're with now, isn't the same person you fell for and just jump ship?
My girl and I have had a very difficult year. I broke up with her over 1 year ago because I was becoming attracted to one of our friends and didnt want to accidently have something happen. I thought that it would be better for us to take a break and let me figure it out. I know that sounds like I just wanted to go fool around, but I didnt and thats not what happened. I pulled Sam (girl from previous post) aside, talked to her, explained things and said that I didnt want to date her then, but that yes I had feelings. We remained friends the 3 of us. Then one day Sam and I kissed. And from then, it all went downhill. Sam and I were....kissing friends for about 2 weeks until one day she pulls me aside to tell me that she is now dating my ex gf. Yes, the one that I took a break from because of her. They were together for one month of which that time my ex realized that she still loved me. They broke up and she came back to me. However, Sam was not out of the picture. No, Sam and my ex continued to fuck eachother behind my back while my ex and I were kinda together again. This went on for 1+ year. About 4 months ago, Sam pulls me aside to tell me that she still has feelings for me, and things with her and ex aren't working. That she wants to try again with me. I knew this whole time what was going on with the two of them and I was getting tired of it. So, I did one more dumb thing and kissed Sam again. Ex found out, and the shit hit the fan. I'm not totally sure why she was so upset, because while I kissed Sam once, she fucked her that same night. Throughout this entire time, we both have had trouble trusting anything the other says. Sam and I are no longer friends of any kind.
So now enter a new friend. She's taken and I have absolutly no desire to ever be anything else other than chat buddies with her. However, ex hates her. She has no reason other than she is a lesbian too. She's afraid that I'm going to 'cheat' on her with this new girl. I continue to tell her that I wont and dont want to. I had coffee yesterday with her and ex found out. So as I'm dropping her off at PT, we get into a yelling match. I told her everything and she's still mad at me. So basically I can't be friends with any other lesbians at all. She just wants me to be at home waiting for her 24/7. But whenever I get upset because Sam comes over to her place late in the evening, I'm the bad guy for worrying.
So I ask, why do I worry? This isn't how I want to be treated in a relationship. Yes, I know I messed up as well. But when I mess up, I say I'm sorry and work my ass off to fix it. She on the other hand continues to sleep with Sam and yell at me for talking to anyone. I know its time to jump ship, but I'm scared. She's my best friend, lives next door, and can't survive at college without my assistance so I dont want to just dump her and run. But I want to be able to talk to people who I have a good time with. If I smile at another girl or guy I feel so guilty. But I know I've done nothing wrong.
Advice?
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Posted by KBoots on 2008-02-21 17:28:40 | Rating: | Views: 75
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jealousy is a viciouse little shit head. while some is very flattering and to be expected when it grows and becomes this giant green eyed piece of crap, then it's time for serious doubts. you can either live with it which i don't think you want or live without it and just remain friends but without the intimacy. or just move on all together. i've found from personal experience that if someone is accusing u 24/7 about shit and almost nuts over the fact that she/he believes you're cheating its most likely them and not you at all. which in this case happens to be true also.you just have to get YOUR priorities in order as to what important to you. some relationships are toxic and just cannot be had.
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Posted by lastblastkl
on 2008-02-21 18:07:27
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