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| Daily Devotions - Losing hope when it hasn't gone
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I have been battling sleep deprivation for over a year now. I work 12-hour shifts in addition to a commute time of 4+ hours round-trip. During my work days, I operate on four hours of sleep, low energy levels, and the hope that the Department of Corrections will return to traditional hours. This hope has kept me going for a year, but recently, we have been told that even though our operational staff vacancy is down, they intend to stay on the long shift-hours for another year. My immediate response was one of horror for I thought: "How am I going to get through another year of sleep deprivation?" My hope was shattered when I heard the news and I felt myself spiralling downward into the pit of panic and despair.
Usually when I hit the bottom of the pit, I bounce right back out because I cling to my faith in the Lord. In clinging to Him, He faithfully pulls me out of the pit. (Note: InHisgripkim) This time, I was so exhausted that I lost my grip on the Lord. I hit bottom and have been down in the pit longer than the norm. Where did my faith in the Lord go? I had forgotten to cling to Him. I have been tearful, frustrated, and have had thoughts of resigning, and it was only today I realized that I had not stayed in Him. I had not been standing in His presence. I came to this blog site and connected with a few Christians (Alice and a few others). I got to talking Christ and Faith and it then dawned on me that I had quit clinging to the Lord, where hope remains constant.. I had been hoping on change in my situation and that hope was not in the Lord but in the Department - something belonging to this world. No wonder why I hit bottom. Hope in the Lord at all times remains constant.. Hope in something belonging to this world does not for anything of this world does will pass away. I just experienced that. When I hope in the Lord, that hope never dies. It is everlasting and eternal. It goes on and on and on and my will to endure goes on and on and on.
I can kick myself for losing sight of the Lord. It has been years since I have allowed this to happen, and I can only guess that the long-term sleep deprivation facilitated this unfortunate weakness. Exhaustion and sleep deprivation has got to have a physiological effect on the brains power to function normally.
I have found hope again, because I am looking for it in the right place - in Jesus, who is always faithful. Time to repent and admit my weakness.
Coincidence? The movie David and Goliath just started. I have the TV on and had no clue that it was going to be on.The movie is about the power of hope and faith in God. David, through faith in God, defeated the giant Goliath.
Isaiah 40:31
But they that wait upon (hope in) the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.
Matthew Henry Commentary:
40:27-31 The people of God are reproved for their unbelief and distrust of God. Let them remember they took the names Jacob and Israel, from one who found God faithful to him in all his straits. And they bore these names as a people in covenant with Him. Many foolish frets, and foolish fears, would vanish before inquiry into the causes. It is bad to have evil thoughts rise in our minds, but worse to turn them into evil words. What they had known, and had heard, was sufficient to silence all these fears and distrusts. Where God had begun the work of grace, he will perfect it. He will help those who, in humble dependence on him, help themselves. As the day, so shall the strength be. In the strength of Divine grace their souls shall ascend above the world. They shall run the way of God's commandments cheerfully. Let us watch against unbelief, pride, and self-confidence. If we go forth in our own strength, we shall faint, and utterly fall; but having our hearts and our hopes in heaven, we shall be carried above all difficulties, and be enabled to lay hold of the prize of our high calling in Christ Jesus.
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Posted by Jesusmyvision on 2007-08-19 04:47:38 | Rating: | Views: 178
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You're absolutely right! It is soooo easy, sometimes, to get distracted by the cares of this life (when we're going through something) and forget momentarily! Thank you, Kim, for reminding me my hope is in Jesus!
Blessings, Alice
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Posted by Alice
on 2007-08-19 14:47:44
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I also have been through this kind of situation a few times before. Thanks for the reminder that yes, God is in control and in the end we will not fail.
Thanks again
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Posted by thunder
on 2007-08-19 15:47:26
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Those who trust in the Lord will renew their strength and rise up on Eagle's wings.
I hope you find time for a nappy. Zzzz.
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Posted by DifficultSoul
on 2007-08-20 02:09:54
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Thanks all!!! Well, it is my days off and I have slept some 20 hours straight my first day off. I cleaned house Sunday while listening to praise and worship. I then shopped for Mom and then took her groceries to her and stayed to visit. Mom is 83, so I treasure the time I have with her and I do make time for her. When I can't go any more, we do know who lifts up and carries us the rest of the way. Footprints in the sand. God bless all of you who have brought me His light.
You are the light of the world.
Huggers,
Kim
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Posted by Jesusmyvision
on 2007-08-20 07:21:50
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Well what can I say.....God alwayz brings us back to Him, no matter how far we may have gone astray. I thank God for your testimony
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Posted by Adunola
on 2007-08-20 08:07:13
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Amen to that Adunola. He is faithful. Blessings to you my dear lady. Hugzzzz.
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Posted by Jesusmyvision
on 2007-08-21 15:28:36
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