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Well, I have been pretty rubbish about this- I guess it is because I have been really busy- but also I have just been down and haven't wanted to write a really negative blog. I wanted this blog to be a way of me exploring my identity in God's family, but I guess this is reality, and if I don't work through the sins and conflicts in me- there wouldn't be any need for Jesus' sacrifice.
This week started with Easter bank holiday monday- which has meant that I have been a bit disorientated all week.
I ran 6k on Monday in the driving snow (yes, snow) and then went on to feel really dizzy and hungry all day- I think it was because I got really cold. Well, Mike and I just ended up watching lots of episodes of House and relaxing. Tuesday was back to Uni- which was good actually; I just did one filling and was quite relaxed. Mike however, is really down and his stomach was playing up really badly. I am finding it so hard. I am such a selfish person. I want to be a better wife. I know that if I stop looking at what I need and rather what he needs I will be happier- I am just struggling to actually do that. I went to the gym tuesday and wednesday- so this week I have done a total of 11k and swum 2k this morning. I feel fitter I think, but had an upset last night as my thighs are touching. I am chunky and I don't like it.
Mike isn't eating properly- we havent had a meal together all week. I find it really tough and want things to be better. I have a need for company and normality around food- but it is a need that Mike can't meet. I don't think it is that he doesn't want to- but i think it is just that he can't right now.
He is away next week and then the week after I am going to Majorca with Amy. I hope that it will be fun, but I am a little scared. Mike is also spending a lot of time with people who have recently been divorced, and I am kind of scared that he will get ideas.
It is bugging me that we haven't heard back about Mozambique yet. I just want to get it sorted and to know what we are doing.
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Posted by JesusFran on 2008-03-28 08:47:58 | Rating: | Views: 60
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I have been reading several of your blogs and I just feel led to pray for you to trust the Lord in some of these areas of your life, particularly driving yourself rather than resting in the Lord. Running and eating healthy are good things - but the anxiety and fear behind them may be something only the Lord can help you overcome. And I truly believe He can. You may enjoy my website at http://devotionalprayerjournal.blogspot.com/ My devotions there and at my thoughts site are written to model a way of praying that applys the Bible to everyday life. I have come to trust His Word as I have shared it with my grown children who also love the Lord. Their pictures are in the sidebar of my main blog.
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Posted by sharetheword
on 2008-04-22 19:26:52
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