It is really sunny here in Newcastle. I spent lunchtime in the park with Davina (a uni friend) which was the nicest way to spend an hour I think.

So-I started well didn't I??!- I dont want every blog entry to be sad and depressing.. but I have had a really crappy day. I ate a bit too much yesterday and let it take over onto today. I made a decision to get up early to work this morning, so I am tired too. Things with hubby are really hard, he is so stressed- and I just feel really sad that he doesn't want me anymore in that way.
I then had too much time for breakfast and so I binged, this then made me really anxious and I felt really defensive so when Mike was getting at me about going to the gym- it just turned into a full scale row- and I called him a tosser- which was really juvenile and I am dissapointed with myself actually.

I have felt really sad and down all day. I am just not where I want to be. I thought that by starting my morning with a bible study I would be starting as I meant to go on- but it just hasn't been the case. I am a Christian- I have no doubt about what Jesus did for me, and have no doubt over my salvation. I just want my life to be a bit different.

People have kids to save a marriage... well we have been married 9months, and we are thinking about getting a dog. Sounds bad doesn't it?! I am in no doubt about my love for mike, or even his love or committment. I believe in our marriage- I just want things to be better. Is that wrong?

It is my birthday on Sunday. I am excited actually. I will be 23. Well actually I am not really that excited. I think I want to cry. I am really hoping this is PMS.