Wow. Thats bad. Maybe you should see a psychologist or something?

reality check.if u could excuse me,next time don't just think about suicide.do it.if u haven't succeeded,buy manual book on how to kill urself correctly.damn it!hard to swallow,ain't it?my REAL advice: 1)make friends,2)go to library and read good books,3)watch educational programs,4)listen to those stupid pop dance songs,5)NEVER DO DRUGS,6)buy lots of colourful stuffs,or if u can't afford it,paint ur stuffs in bright colours,7)go read my blogs.good luck!

i know exactly how you feel. i have dreams too... its scary and you can't control them right? they just happen randomly; those thoughts about hurting yourself. i randomly cry and feel like i have a knife in my heart, twisting and turning causing me more pain. nothing seems to help. i recently started going to a therapist, they dont help all that much they dont give you advice they sit and listen to you and ask you questions. it might help to talk about stuff though, everyone is different, maybe it would help. let me know how it works out for you