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| Today's Adolescent Moment #2
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I hate jumping to conclusions. So I don't want to do that, but I feel like a doggone teenager all over again in dealing with my dad's wife. I'm a grown woman who lives in her own apartment. And yet here I am in such angst wondering if I need to be slighted and upset again.
I'm really starting to wonder because... I borrowed my dad's air purifier when my sister visited me a few months ago. My dad called me last month asking if I still had it (he couldn't remember if I had returned it or not) I said I did and he said he'd come get it. Well as a jesture - an offering of peace between his wife and me, I suggested that she be the one to pick it up since she literally works on the street I live on, just 3 minutes away. He kept beating around the bush and insisting that he'd get it.
Well, today a letter came to his house addressed to me. (I never lived in that house so it's always weird when that happens) Again, I suggested rather than having him go all the way out of his way to come make an exchange, his wife could do it. And again he "uhhhed" and "ummmed" and so I tried really hard to not take that the wrong way...
But I'm starting to get the feeling that she might have expressed to him that she doesn't like me. It's not like it's a big secret to me. In fact I'd rather prefer it over her two-faced behavior. She acts like she wants to get to know me and be a big happy family when she's hanging on my dad's arm... then she turns around and says something evil when he's out of earshot or so she thinks. She got busted once and my dad made her apolgize. My dad had never done that before in my life - put me over anyone or defended me... :- anywho. That particular time she said to me... I has just lost my job - the only reason she agreed to my dad asking her to help me with my finances was because she wanted me out of their pockets.
But that was 6 months ago. I decided that I didn't want to be angry over that. I don't like being mad or hurt over a person. It's exhausting... so I wanted to forgive. And I did. I even bought her a mother's day card.... mainly because I was forced to see her on mother's day. But I went over and actually hugged her. I wasn't pretending, but I thought 2 years was long enough to not like someone for something that can't be controlled. (I was not in favor of my dad's marriage to this stranger, but he married her so that doesn't matter anymore.)
The thing is, what really bothered me from the beginning and is starting to make me suspicious of this new thing is that, when my dad told me he wanted to start dating this woman at church, he promised he wouldn't rush into anything and he'd take it slow (mind you he told me he liked someone new 1 year to the date that I learned my parent's divorce was finalized). A couple of weeks later he introduces me to his fiance at the family reunion planning meeting. The 2nd time I met her was at my brother's birthday party for his kids where there were tons of people who didn't even know that he and my mom had divorced and they only knew my dad through my mom. She showed me her ring. She wasn't supposed to be there. The third time I met her was while picking out and trying on dresses to be her bridesmaids. Between the 3rd anf 4th time seeing her she made a remark about how I couldn't eat anything before the wedding so that I could still fit into my dress because I wasn't skinny like her. The fourth time I saw her was at her wedding rehersal where I met my 2nd of 2 step brothers (different from the brother I mentioned above). The fifth time I saw her was at the wedding where I met the 3rd of the step-brothers I inherited. All of this happened in 3 months. She met my aunts more than me. I wasn't invited to the bridal shower.
Before they were married, she never attempted to reach out and get to know me, asked me any questions or spend any kind of time with me. I was offended at that. She still hasn't reached out to me..... OOOOOOOH but she has the nerve to always want to bring up to my dad how I didn't speak to her here until 5 minutes later, or how I didn't hug her or whatever. That is such bologna!
Anywho, so lol I decided to let that go, right? :) But now I'm thinking is she up to her old tricks? While she never had a problem dropping by my house unannounced, she never wanted to get to know me and anytime she spoke to me away from my dad she would say witchy stuff. So, do I assume? I don't want to assume. If she's not going to be an adult, I can be. I guess I just have to ask her. It's childish otherwise right? I just hate being put in this position where I feel like I'm a daggone teenager all over again. :-(
All of this stuff happened in my adulthood at and over the age of 25! What kind of nonsense!!!!!????? |
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Posted by JMlessons on 2008-06-11 23:07:06 | Rating: | Views: 61
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