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| A Wild Snorlax Appears! In a tiny speedo.
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I am on vacation. *Sarcastic obligatory hoorah*
Don't get me wrong. I love me some vacation. I'm staying in a beach house on Hilton Head island (South Carolina) with my family. It's really nice. But still *Sarcastic obligatory hoorah*
Reasons:
1) I don't need to unwind. I don't stress about things very often, so I basically never need a vacation. All I need is food, friends, family, and some time to write when I feel like it.
2) I'm a home body. I love my house. I'm so incredibly comfortable in it. It's like nowhere else in the world. I'm happier there than anywhere else by a long shot. Vacations uproot me. Oh noes.
3) This is a beach vacation which means I'm going to be spending a lot of time covered in sun screen and reading a magazine. I am pretty excited about the latest GQ (39 fashion tips to keep me looking cool!!!!!!!!) so you know the reading part won't be bad, but I'm a college student on summer break. I want to fucking rage with my friends at night.
4) Beaches are filled with a few awkward things:
SUBLIST
a) little kids with swimsuits that are too large. Parents, you are the only person who thinks that your chld is that cute. Guess who doesn't want to see them naked. This guy.
b) Fat Dudes.
c) Fat Ladies.
d) Fat Dudes who are with Fat Ladies.
*Especially if said large ones are in small swimsuits. This happens! Why? Oh God, why?
e) Extremely good looking chicks in bikinis.
SIDENOTE: The problem with ladies who are this foxy is that half of them have boyfriends, and the other half are either a hot steaming bucket of crazy or filthy filthy whores. Guess who doesn't want VD. This guy. Also, who wants the possibility of sporting a rodney in a swimsuit with their family sitting right there?
5) It was an 18 hour drive. Come on, that's just a pain in the ass.
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Anyway, I'm still going to have a good time. Because anywhere that I am is a good time. It's basically how I roll.
This is the end of the post, so I'm chuckin' that deuce.*
*Throwing the peace sign. Or otherwise peacing out.
JBP
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Posted by JBP on 2008-06-22 00:20:52 | Rating: | Views: 295
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Oh jeez, thats gotta be bad. Hope your home soon!
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Posted by TheLoneShadow
on 2008-06-22 04:48:24
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JBP - You know I really love reading your posts (no obligatory sarcasm there... I promise! :)).
Good Luck with the vacation...
and ahh the other things you are expecting to see or feel at the beach..
I hope you get pleasantly surprised... Just remember us back home working and wishing we were where you are! LOL
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Posted by EasyToSay
on 2008-06-22 08:28:03
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