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February 15th
So, besides me buying my mother and I teddy bears, I had a Valentine's day flop! I didn't beat myself about it too badly because I tend to visualize my life to come and how this is only temporary insanity. In my vision, my hubby, who massages my feet on a daily basis, takes me out......Read More

Posted on: 2010-02-15 21:20:51 | Rating:

| Views: 8 | Comments: 0 | Tags: Valentines day husband feet

Happy V!
Good morning my fellow Valentinees! I am feeling good because for the first year in a while that I have no Valentine, I have no boyfriend too. There's nothing like claiming to be in a relationship with someone and spending special occasions alone. What's the point? Well this year I am adult......Read More

Posted on: 2010-02-14 08:59:52 | Rating:

| Views: 5 | Comments: 0 | Tags: Valentines. going out

For David Bass
I am so sorry about your mom. Some time around 6am or 3am your time I cried in bed about my life. I felt defeated. All the awful comments of the past came back to haunt me and really took a toll. I said "they were right, I am a waste", Look at me in the same room in the same position......Read More

Posted on: 2010-02-11 10:06:58 | Rating:

| Views: 12 | Comments: 0 | Tags: life death giving up

I'm back! Explicit Content
I am finally back. It's definitely been a while and I must admit that I missed blogging. I have to remember that it's actually safer for me to vent to the wo rld as opposed to the people I know that I think give a rats XXXXX. I always get bit in the end because they prove to me that they were......Read More

Posted on: 2010-02-06 22:23:52 | Rating:

| Views: 13 | Comments: 1 | Tags: model student accomplished

Smh Explicit Content
Cried myself to sleep last night. I was very upset about my status. I'm still here in this room without a pot to XXXXX in. I am not comfortable like this especially when I know I could be better. If this is normal or your best it wouldn't really matter to you but this isn't me. I am going to......Read More

Posted on: 2009-12-13 10:58:15 | Rating:

| Views: 18 | Comments: 1 | Tags: broke

Again
I feel sad again and lonely. As usual to make myself feel better I turn to Seal or his lovely wife. I use them as motivation to push me forward when I'm falling behind. I want the love that they have. And their happiness and peace of mind. I am lost right now and no amount of swimming lessons......Read More

Posted on: 2009-12-10 19:58:51 | Rating:

| Views: 10 | Comments: 0 | Tags: Heidi Klum Seal sad

Slow day
Today is my rest day and although I rather be occupied it is well appreciated. I came home from my friend's house this morning and went straight to cleaning the house. It looks and smells much better and I know my mom will instantly see the difference. I think I'm going to watch some television......Read More

Posted on: 2009-12-10 16:28:35 | Rating:

| Views: 12 | Comments: 0 | Tags: Chef Ramsey exercise feel good

Just got back from working out Explicit Content
I am soar just the way I like it. My mission is in gear now and I'm loving it. Can't wait to see the final results. I feel good going to the gym. It's different this time because I want to and am not forcing myself to go. It truly is a good way to blow off steam and I totally get why so many......Read More

Posted on: 2009-12-08 18:11:40 | Rating:

| Views: 9 | Comments: 0 | Tags: gym workout regular stress

Goodmorning Wednesday
I woke up this morning feeling okay besides the fact that I have been over sleeping lately. I don't know, I make sure I don't go to bed too early so I won't wake up at weird hours and still no early rising. Oh well. I worked out at my school gym yesterday then went to my friends gym to visit......Read More

Posted on: 2009-12-08 09:25:59 | Rating:

| Views: 9 | Comments: 0 | Tags: relationship gym friends

I feel good Explicit Content
So today I had quite a bit of errands to run and accomplished them all. Yesterday I ended up arguing with the girl that lives in my mothers house with me because she clearly lost her min d approaching me the way that she did. It felt good to scream out "XXXXX! We don't owe you XXXXX! and......Read More