It is officially now Thanksgiving and while my life may be more confusing than it has ever been I'm still very thankful. My step daugher and the baby are coming over for dinner tomorrow. We all went out to dinner tonight and then went shopping.

 When I'm with N it is instant happiness. Sometimes people will see her and me with the baby and assume that we are a couple and that the baby is ours. That makes me feel incredibly proud. And we talk so much when we are together now. There is an unmistakable connection and I can just feel it getting stronger. It is so strange that I could have lived 44 years without feeling this for anyone. I believe the Lord has a plan for all of us but this is just bizarre.

 I certainly don't want to sound like I'm complaining. If all I get out of this relationship is good conversation and the occassional hug, I'll take it. Being near her is a lot better than never knowing her.

 I still don't want to hurt my wife (her mom) so I'll do what I have to do. It kind of sucks but that's who I am and we all have to be who we are. My wife has been hurt enough and I'm not going to contribute to that.

 On a happier note, I hope all of you have a wonderful Thanksgiving full of turkey, football and friendship. And if you find yourself wanting for friends, there are a bunch of us here.