As we get closer to the holidays, I always treat myself to a sampler of Barney's coffees, it's gotten to be like a tradition. Nice to have good coffee in the house when people come to visit over the holidays.
I was walking through the mall a while back, and I stopped into one of my favorite coffee places, Barney's Coffee, for a cappuccino and I wanted to see if they had the sampler package out for Christmas yet, they usually start selling it about this time of year.
The sampler pack has 3 types of awesome coffees in it. It has Barney's Christmas Blend, Kona, and Special Dark Roast, but the Kona is my favorite! If you love coffee, and have never tried Kona, get off your ass and LIVE!
As I waited for the girl to cook my cappuccino, I went looking for the Sampler. After I couldn't find it, I asked the girl at the counter, but " ... I guess the hadn't released it yet for the holidays", she said; and I was very disappointed.
So I thought maybe I could make up my own sampler pack by just buying a pound of each. Now, if I remember correctly, the sampler pack was $25 or $30 and each pack of coffee was 3/4 of a pound.
Things were looking good for making my own sampler, until I get to the Kona coffee; I look at the coffee and its $38 per pound, and I nearly fell on the floor, so I said to the girl, "I think this price is marked incorrectly". She tells me that the price is correct, so I sarcastically asked her "... how much it is just to smell it".
The Kona coffee is from Hawaii, so naturally you would expect it to cost a little more, I guess because it is made by cute island girls with grass skirts and an awesome tan. I remember smoking pot from Hawaii that was outrageously priced, but you kind of expected that since it is grown by large sweaty Hawaiian dudes that guard the crops with automatic weapons inside of an inactive volcano, but this is coffee, not an illegal substance like marijuana!
I was devastated to find out that my favorite middle-aged thrill is now $38/lb. and that is the correct price - WTH? I have a reputation to consider ... when I am invited to someones house for dinner around the holidays, I would always bring a Sampler pack from Barney's and the hosts would still be raving about how good the Kona coffee was the following year, and it always got me an invitation to come back next year, because I always bring the best damn coffee!
What's the world coming to ... am I getting old or just being cheap? The fact is, this holiday season, I wont be able to afford the Kona coffee, and it is making me depressed; and that doesn't usually happen until after New Years, when I have to pay all the bills from Christmas!
So this holiday season, if you invite me for dinner, I will bring a can of Maxwell House coffee in the pretty red and green coffee can, or maybe I will bring you a big fat joint of Hawaiian instead, because I think pot is cheaper than coffee these days!
- Thom
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