I hate how sometimes everything will seem to be going good and then one stupid little thing stuffs it all up, and I'm back to doubting everything again. Last night me and my boy went shopping for outfits to wear to a wedding tomorrow. I found two dresses I really liked and couldn't decide so bought them both (they were cheap and on special, so double bonus) and my boy found a pair of dress pants and a shirt to go with one of my dresses. We were having a great time - laughing, holding hands, joking, talking, spending up big (oops naughty us) and I felt really happy. Then we were walking through the food court and he stopped dead and said 'oh god theres the ex'.

Now if you've read my other posts, you may know about her - I refer to her as the Dreaded Ex. I haven't seen her for ages - months and months which is good coz she doesn't like me. She's one of those people who is always shopping and bitching and for a while I stopped going down town so I could avoid her. But I haven't seen her lately, just had to deal with her family mostly - they hate me too. knocking into me and start screaming at me in the middle of the mall - it's embarressing and they always aim for me.

Anyways, so here we were having a great time and suddenly there she is - giving me the death glare like how dare I be in her territory - and with bags in my hand, no less!! She always assumes my boy buys stuff for me and then complains coz here she is a single mother with no money blah blah blah... My boy pays child support and when she runs up bills on his accounts, he pays them to avoid starting trouble. The fact is, his child support is so much, his take home pay is rather measly. So last night i bought everything - a couple hundred dollars on him. I don't mind, I like doing it. I work hard for it and like so spoil my boy when he gets a bad paycheque.

So, she's giving me the death glare and looking me up and down and whispering to her friend. I've learnt to ignore this. My boy went up to talk to his daughter and she came running up to me to give me a hug and the dreaded ex called her back sharply and if looks could kill - I'd be dead 5 times over. So I sat on a bench and waited. Little bits of the conversation floated over - 'what you are doing, spending all your money on HER!!?' 

I glaced over a few times and looked at her - she is really pretty and dresses in all the latest fashions, so I'm a bit intimidated by her. So as I was sneaking peaks I noticed something that made me feel a little better. Her clothes, while still in fashion, looked ugly. It's all starting to go really old fashioned - old printed fabrics and no shape what-so-ever. So here she was in the latest fashion and she looked horrible!! She is forever dying her hair and at the moment it is blonde - but I think she went really dark before this, so now it looks kinda grey and really unhealthy. Frizzy and coarse and not shiny and beautiful like usual. And the best thing - she's is looking really old!! She is only 27, so few years older than me, but she has really bad lines around her eyes, dark circles under them and her foundation looked like it had been put on in the dark and way too heavy.

I stopped looking at her after this and had a little smile on my face - its bitchy, yes - but I felt better. She always acted better than me and turned her nose down at me, but I felt better that her looks are slowly fading away - the one thing she has going for her. Her personality is the pitts, she thinks everyone owes her everything and hasn't held a decent job in her life.

I saw one of the lady's I used to go to TAFE with and started talking to her for a bit then my boy said he as ready to go. He didn't look happy anymore and the dreaded ex gave me one last dirty before pulling her daughter away from me. As we started walking away i heard 'bitch' being thrown in my direction. As looked back, she was pointing and laughing at me.

So I mentioned to my boy how old she's starting to look and he laughed and said yeah. The rest of the night was okay, but whenever we see her, my boy gets into a downer of a mood. Not suprising really when he gets abused everytime. 

I hate seeing her. She makes me feel inferior and always puts me down to my boy. He stands up for me, but its getting old now. Nearly three years and she hasn't moved on. There is only so much I can put up with...

Sorry. Thats my bitch for the day. Gotta get it outta my system so I can be all happy for my friend tomorrow - she's getting married - woo hoo!!