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Last Friday was ANZAC Day. My grandfather always marches proudly in his home town ANZAC Day Parade. Dressed in a suit and showing off his medals, its an annual tradition. That seems everyone in our family has taken for granted over the last few years. A couple of grandkids turn up every year but I don't ever remember every single one turing up. About ten years ago, when he had a couple health problems, a few more turned up, fearing it would be his last march.
This year very well may be. In February of this year, at age 92, my grandfather had a stroke and has gone down hill since then. He still hasn't fully recovered even though it was only a minor one. He has had a couple turns since then. At one stage my grandmother called a family meeting saying things were worse than they actually were.
For as long as I can remember, he has had a vegie patch. Back in the days when he lived on te farm and now that have moved into town, he still set a vegie patch in the backyeard. Even my mum remembers him always having a vegie patch. This year, after his couple of turns, he tore out his vegie patch. Saying he didn't have the strength to keep it up. That was a bad sign. He lived for his vegie patch and hearing about it being pulled out meant he was giving up.
He didn't want to march in the parade this year, coz he has trouble walking and sometimes just standing . So I decided to go up to his town and drive in the parade. I was ervous about doing it, but in the end I'm so glad I did. I don't want to think about him not being here next year, but seeing him made me realise that its a very real possibility. He didn't even want to go in the parade with my offer to drive him, but got talked into it. He ended up having a good day. He didn't leave the car at all, but people went out of their way to come up and talk to him. He lives in small town where everyone knows everyones business so they all know about his health.
When we first arrived at his home, seeing the way he was nearly made me cry. I've always known him to be a strong, independant person. Now he is helpless and frail. He was being showered by my uncle, and even thogh we had a hour til we had to get to the parade, he was in a rush to get dressed and get to the meeting point. We couldn't talk him out of waiting a while. SO he was ready and dressed (which he needed help with) with 45 mins to spare. Then he kept getting up and stressing over how late we were going to be. He got upset when he couldn't tie his tie and had to be calmed down while I did it for him. We went outside to sit in the sun for a while and while he was sitting there, he was telling me and my mum about how ready to go. He could another turn at any time and he was ready to go. He had already gone round to his friends and said his goodbyes and now he was just wating for the inevitable... Mum kept saying he has plenty of years left in him and we'll be back next year to drive him in the parade again.
Someone said , as horrible as it sounds, that sometimes you just know when you're going to die and do everything before you do, they end up giving up and giving in.. Its heartbreaking to see him this way...
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I came across this blog and I know it's well and truly awhile ago, I just wanted to let you know that you wrote it so beautifully and I hope your Grandfather is doing well still.
You sound like a great grand daughter to him, and I'm sure he appreciates the love you have for him.
xx
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Posted by EasyToSay
on 2008-08-09 07:42:58
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