I am extremely happy. I'm going to get right to the point. The other night, Riley told me he loves me. We kissed for like... hours, and we fooled around. He asked if I wanted to have sex. We didn't, but he asked, and like... oh my gosh. Idk how I could be happier. This brings us to a whole new level. (Wow, level is level backwards, idk that) I'm so... pleased. I mean. Okay, so it sounds dirty, kissing for hours and screwing around, but it didn't seem preverted to me. It didn't seem wrong. It was like... idk, romantic almost, in a way. Like... at first, I was trying to go a little fast, but he slowed me down, and I'm glad he did. We didn't just, do anything. I think it made it special. Well, to me. Then yesterday afternoon the same thing. Idk. Now though, the doors are open. It could happen again, which is good, but idk about the sex thing yet. It's not that I don't want to, it's not because of him, and I think I've said this before, its just, I'm not quite comfortable with myself... naked. At all. The only time I'm ever completely naked is in the shower. I don't think if I had sex it would be completely naked, but the amount I'd have to be would be... like, half. Unless I wore a skirt, but screw that, it's cold out and that's suggestive. I don't want to make this relationship into just... physical. I don't think it could be that way. I mean, like, yesterday, before we even got off the bed, we were back to normal. Like... it didn't just happen. I love that it's not awkward. He was naked and we were laughing about something completely off topic.
Anyways...
Idk what I should do. I'm thinking of the pill, just in case, but idk if I'll be comfortable with... naked. Ever. Unless I lose some weight.