And yes, I did it again!  Two days in a row without cheating.  How does that grab ya?  I'm on a roll!  I'm feeling pretty invincible now so we'll see how long that lasts.  And the scale LOVED me this morning.  I think it practically jumped up and kissed me!  104.4. 

I sent out an invite to our friends to share in the big competition day.  I've had a few responses and now I feel as though I could throw up!  What have I done?  I can't quit now.  I can't even falter!  I'm doomed!  Secretly, I'm thrilled that I have so many in my corner but even more secretly, I'm scared to death!  Along the way people have said "how brave" or "how inspiring" or "you go girl" but most recently someone said "you seem so shy... but so brave to share so intimately...".  I told this to hubby and even he agreed.  What?  OMG!  What have I done?  I started this blog to keep a diary of my journey.  I wanted to share it anonymously but found that when I told people about it, some were drawn to it.  I enjoyed their responses.  I enjoyed the cheers.  I needed the support.  Desperately.  Now, I'm thinking I should have kept my big mouth shut and kept this to myself.  Why didn't I just do the old fashioned diary thing?  Why put it out there?  And why tell people about it?  Why tell people I KNOW about it?  Why not just let complete strangers follow along if they so desired?  Why?

Cuz, I'm crazy.  And I need accountability.  I need people I know to be watching.  Will she do it?  Will she quit?  Will she give up?  How will she do?  I need them.  I need everyone of them.  Crazy or not.  Every thing happens for a reason.  I had the idea to start a blog.  I found one that allowed me to be myself and not give up any more than what I wanted.  I started and I haven't looked back.  I've been stubborn.  I've been diligent.  I've been a little whacko.  But it is what it is.  This time around has been tougher mentally.  But this blog thing.  Its kept me in it.  Knowing or EVEN thinking that someone I know might be reading it keeps me going.  It doesn't change what I write or how I feel.  It just keeps me in the game.  I never know what I will write.  I just sit down and start typing.  When I'm done I look it over and MANY MANY MANY times I think "I should delete that" but I don't.  It is what it is.  I can't change it.  I wouldn't change it.  It's my journey.  Good, bad or ugly.  Its mine.

Yes, I can be shy.  Yes, I'm scared to death of what people will think of me.  But, I set a goal.  I'm going for it.  Come hell or high water.  I'm going for it. 

Follow if you dare...