Katie marveled at the stateliness of the house as she followed Widdershins to its door.
 
“But I thought that freshmen had to bunk in the common dorms their first year,” Katie said.

“That is the policy, yes,” said Widdershins. “But not all freshmen are the same. Those who are uniquely gifted are placed in private housing—for all the obvious reasons. And while you and Chani are certainly gifted, that is not the sole reason why I’ve placed you in Cahernan House. Cahernan House, you see, was the dorm where your mother and I lived during our semesters at Derring-Do. I’ve even given the two of you our old room.”

“That’s fantastic!” Katie said. This far exceeded her expectations, and she understood now why Widdershins had called this the “really big treat!” “But how did you know about Chani?”

“I am not without my resources,” said Widdershins, giving Katie a conspiratorial wink. “Let’s go inside, shall we?”

A giant banner proudly exclaiming “Welcome New and Returning Heroes!” in large fluorescent pink letters hung from the ceiling of the sitting room and rippled cheerfully on the currents of air wafting in through the open windows. It brought a smile to Katie’s face as she entered the room. A row of tables loaded with a variety of snack foods was arranged in front of a massive fieldstone fireplace, in the center of which someone had crammed a large stuffed owl wearing a shirt with the words “Cahernan Girls Rule!” emblazoned across the front.

In the very center of the room, four girls were sitting on a pair of deep-cushioned sofas arranged on either side of a stone table etched with runes and brimming with stunning bouquets of wildflowers. Upon seeing Widdershins, they leapt to their feet—well, three of them did anyway; the fourth, a pixie, shot into the air upon a pair of gossamer wings—and beamed at her.

“Dean Widdershins, this is a pleasant surprise!” gushed the foremost of them, a tall, golden-haired girl with a smile that seemed impossibly large for her dainty face. “On behalf of the girls of Cahernan House, I’d like to thank you for arranging such a wonderful welcoming brunch.” She ended with a squeaky laugh that made the other girls roll their eyes.

“You’re quite welcome, Miss Urquardt,” said Widdershins in a bemused tone. She turned and motioned Katie to her side. “Girls, this is Katie Frost, your new freshman housemate. She is my former partner’s daughter, so I expect you all to extend her an open hand in friendship and sisterhood.”

The blonde girl gave Katie a too, too lively wide-eyed smile and grasped her by both hands. “I feel like we’re friends already!” she squeaked. “Welcome to Cahernan House! I’m Petula Urquardt. But everyone here calls me Pet. Can I call you Kat?”

Katie found it difficult to maintain an honest smile. “Actually, er…”

“Come meet our sisters.” Still grasping Katie’s hands, Petula half-guided, half-dragged her over to where the other girls were standing. Katie could tell by their expressions that they were irritated by Petula’s flatteries and at the extreme limits of their patience.

“Honestly, Pet!” said the pixie, whose wings hummed angrily as she sank to the level of Katie’s face. “You’re such a suck-up. How can you even stand to look at yourself in the mirror?”

She was as wildly beautiful as any pixie Katie had ever seen, with wide, bright, blue-within-blue eyes and hair the exact color and texture of grass. She wore an orange dress fashioned from an autumn leaf and her feet were adorned with tiny white slippers woven from spider silk.

“This is Trinket,” said Petula, in a chilly tone. “She’s a sophomore this year, like the rest of us.”

“Oh?” said Katie as Trinket seized her finger and shook it. “And what sort of hero are you studying to become?”

“A barbarian,” the pixie replied in an upbeat voice. Her chameleon-like skin changed from scarlet to a bright sea green, while the tips of her pointy ears flushed yellow. “My mother wanted me to be a damsel in distress, but I’m much too tom-girlish for that sort of thing.”

Katie blinked in surprise. “Oh, well, er, that’s…great!”

“And I’m Gwillian Targlemoor,” said the next girl in line before Petula could open her mouth. She had a certain animation of character that Katie found compelling. She was short and stout, with a round face framed by a wealth of rich, glowing auburn hair. Her hazel-green eyes were wise and mischievous, and sharp as lightning. “I’m a Ranger.”

“And this is Ella Millani,” said Petula quickly, motioning Katie’s attention to the last girl in line.

“A pleasure,” said Ella as she pumped Katie’s hand. “You wouldn’t happen to be any relation to Allita Frost, would you?”

“Why, yes.” Katie was surprised by the question. “She was my mother.”

“I used to follow her exploits in Adventure Magazine when I was little,” said Ella. “She’s the reason why I’m studying to be an Adventurer.”

Katie returned the girl’s eager smile and felt an instant friendship click between them.

“Allita would have been thrilled to hear you say that, Ella,” said Widdershins as she came up and stood at Katie’s side. “Perhaps later Katie can tell you about some of the adventures that Adventure Magazine didn’t print.”

“I’d like that,” said Ella.

“Me, too,” said Katie.

Widdershins nodded. “Now, if you’ll excuse us, ladies. I wish to show Katie her room.”

Petula giggled as she stepped aside. “Be sure to come back, Katie,” she said. “We’ll all go to the Orientation together, okay?”

“Okay,” Katie said over her shoulder as she turned to follow Widdershins.

They entered a hallway just off the sitting room, which contained the doorways to three bedrooms. Upon each door was a shiny bronze plaque, each engraved with the names of the girls who would occupy the rooms for the semester. Katie read the plaque to door number three wearing a proud grin:

Katie pushed open the door and stepped inside, feeling a mixture of awe and deep respect wash over her. This was the very room her mother had lived in! She could almost sense her presence lingering in the elegant decorative paneling, in the golden-hued wood floor, in the beds arranged just so beneath the enormous leaded plate glass window. The room itself was three times the size of her room back home and was stylish beyond compare. It had character, too, which made one feel immediately comfortable.

“Your mother slept in the left-hand bed; I was to the right,” said Widdershins. “And let me show you something else.”

She went to the walk-in closet, which was lined with ages-old cedar, and pointed to an area just below the point where the wall met the ceiling. From where she stood, Katie could see that it was an inscription of sorts, but had to rise to the tips of her toes to read it:

“Your mother carved that herself,” said Widdershins.

Katie reached up and ran her fingertips along the inscription.

“Farcool,” she whispered wonderingly.

“I thought you’d find that interesting,” Widdershins said. “This is my way of honoring your mother—and of bringing you closer to her spirit.” She shut her eyes and heaved a sigh that seemed to long for something. “Sometimes, if I reach out with my senses, I can almost feel her in these places—in the classrooms, at the Commons, and here, in this room, especially. I want you to be able to sense her just as I do, in all the places that she loved while she was here.”

Katie placed a loving hand on Widdershins’ arm. “I already do, Aggie,” she said. “But I sense her most of all in your presence.”

Widdershins opened her eyes and Katie saw tears of joy welling there. “That is kind of you to say, child,” she said sincerely.

Wiping her eyes, Widdershins collected herself and crossed to the door. “I must be on my way. You need to get better acquainted with the girls, and I need to prepare for Orientation. Remember, it’s being held this afternoon on the Center Green and you will be required to attend.”

Katie gave the woman a hug.

“Thank you, Aggie—for everything,” she said. “What you’ve done for me…it really means a lot.”

“It was my pleasure,” Widdershins said with a fond smile. She stepped through the door into her office, then turned and said, “Don’t forget the Orientation.”

“I won’t,” Katie said.

With nothing to unpack until her effects arrived, Katie returned to the sitting room and found the girls milling about the food table looking decidedly awkward.

Hearing her footfalls, Gwillian turned and glanced surreptitiously down the empty hallway at Katie’s back. “Is Widdershins still here?” she whispered.

“She just left,” said Katie.

The four girls breathed a collective sigh of relief and scattered into the room. Gwillian kicked off her shoes and flopped onto the couch with a groan; Ella retreated into a corner, removed the blanket from around a thick wooden pole wedged there, and placed her ear against it; Petula ran to the mirror hanging above the fireplace and began to preen her hair; and Trinket darted about, straightening and arranging and tidying practically everything in the room. It seemed to Katie that she detested any sort of disorganization whatsoever, even to the smallest degree. It was a strange habit for a pixie to have—especially one who wished to be a barbarian.

“I’m glad that’s over,” Petula said self-importantly.

“Really?” said Gwillian. “It sounded to me as if you were enjoying yourself.” Her voice shifted into a perfect imitation of Petula’s. “ ‘On behalf of the girls of Cahernan House, I’d like to thank you for the wonderful yummy mummy munchies you sent us, Dean Widdershins.’ ” She added a squeaky laugh that made Petula shoot her a withering look.

“You’re just jealous that you’re not as outgoing as I am,” she said offhandedly.

“Jealous of you?” Gwillian let out a mighty guffaw. “That’ll be the day!”

Katie went to the snack table and grabbed a handful of tangerine snaps. She hadn’t eaten a bite of food all morning, and she was positively ravenous.

“You had better take more than that,” Petula said, glancing at Katie’s reflection in the mirror. “Food has a way of disappearing into Gwillian’s stomach if it’s left about too long. It’s a rather nasty habit she’s developed. When she was a freshman she was skinny as a rail. Now look at her.”

“That’s a terribly rude thing to say about a housemate,” Katie said.

“Don’t get too worked up over the drivel that comes out of Pet’s mouth, Katie,” said Gwillian. “She’s just an envious little creature who needs to taunt others for doing what she herself would love to do. But, of course, she has to watch her figure.”

“Yes, I do,” agreed Petula. She plucked out a stray eyelash and let it fall. Trinket dove to catch it and immediately whisked it over to the trash. “Gwillian is under the impression that college is all about learning. But what she refuses to realize is that it’s also about socializing—you know, making friends and having experiences.”

“She means meeting boys,” Gwillian added sourly.

Petula chuckled as one would in the presence of an insufferable child. “That’s part of it, too.” She paused to rake her gaze across Katie’s face. “Studying is important, don’t get me wrong; I wouldn’t have a four-star average if I didn’t believe that. But there’s nothing wrong with having a social life…or several admirers...either. Stick with me, Katie, and you’ll have no shortage of both.”

It was Gwillian’s turn to chuckle. “How many admirers did you have last semester, Pet? By my count, it was two: Chuggy Whirlwound and Dooley MagDuffy. That’s not ‘several’ admirers, Pet. That’s hardly any.” She flashed Katie a grin. “She scared Chuggy away by being too clingy, and as for Dooley…”

“Dooley and I dated the entire summer, thank you very much,” Petula said proudly. “And he has all but admitted that he wants us to be heartfriends this semester, so stuff that in your mouth and eat it, Gwill.”

“Unfortunately,” said Ella, still with her ear against the post. “I don’t think you’ll be seeing much of Dooley this semester.”

Petula’s hand froze in mid-primp. “What do you mean?” she demanded.

“Word is he and Mursha Tefflehinger are heartfriends now.”

“What?” Petula’s cry rattled the windows. Shock and indignation marched across her face as if it were a battlefield. “When did this happen?”

“Last week,” said Ella.

“Where is he now? Is he on campus?”

“He’s with Mursha down at Lickety Splits. They’re sharing a raspberry float and looking all dreamy-eyed at each other—as rumor has it.”

“That snake!” Petula seethed as she spun from the mirror and charged out of the room. A second later Katie heard her shout “Bizarre Bazaar!” and then the house fell oddly silent.

Gwillian grinned and peered over the couch at Ella. “He really isn’t dating Mursha, is he?” she asked.

Ella’s answering chuckle was deliciously devious. “Of course not,” the girl said dismissively. “But I had to do something to get her out of the house. That snooty tone of hers was beginning to drive me crazy.”

Katie sat on the arm of the sofa and cast a curious look at the pole. “What it that you’re listening to?” she asked.

Ella waved her over. “This,” she said proudly, “is a little thing called a Gossip Column.”

“Ella enchanted it last spring when she stumbled across the spell in the library,” said Trinket as she brushed the crumbs from Katie’s lap and into her hands. “It has come in quite handy—especially when our teachers decide to throw unpops.”

“Unpops?” Katie said quizzically.
 
“Unpopular quizzes,” said Gwillian. “The teachers here love to spring them on their students from time to time.”
At Ella’s insistence, Katie placed her ear against the pole. A burst of jumbled conversation, like that heard while standing in the middle of a crowd, filled her head.

“…and so that is why Sherna isn’t coming back this semester…”

“…told me that Praelector Murgin will be doubling the reading load this year…"

“…you’ll never believe who managed to qualify for Dangling Two…"

“…Lector Wrunlow says she’s only teaching three sections of Oddysh…"

Katie frowned as she drew away from the pole. “I can only follow snippets of what they’re saying,” she said.

“That’s to be expected,” said Ella. “It takes some practice, but once you get good at it, you’ll be able to follow the lot of them simultaneously.”

“Simultaneously?” said Katie. “But that thing must be picking up hundreds of conversations,” she said.

Ella nodded. “And I can understand half of them.”

Katie shook her head in amazement.

“By the way,” said Trinket. “Who do you suppose sent those Ogrim to attack you this morning, Katie?”

“How did you hear about that?” Katie said.

The pixie rolled her eyes and nodded at the pole.

“Oh, right,” said Katie, resisting the urge to kick herself. “Well, to answer your question, I haven’t a clue. Has rumor of the attack gone around campus that quickly?”

“Only among the Golem Knights,” Ella said. “It’s all they’re talking about.”

Inwardly, Katie breathed a sigh of relief. “Well, that’s good,” she said. “For a minute there I thought you had overheard Widdershins and me talking about it.”

“The Gossip Column only listens in on gossip, not outright conversations,” Ella said matter-of-factly. “Besides, even if I could, I wouldn’t dare eavesdrop on a Cahernan Girl.” Her voice rang with honesty, which made Katie feel a little better about the situation.

“We’d better get down to the Center Green,” said Gwillian, leaping from the sofa. “They’ll be starting Orientation soon.”

Katie downed the last of her tangerine snaps and followed her to the door. So far, she thought, her first day at Derring-Do was going really rather well.

Copyright © 2008 by Kevin Scott Munnings
“The Book of All Things” ISBN-13: 978-1-4276-1874-0
All Rights Reserved