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I love my Mama very much. In fact she did some wonderful things for us yesterday. But there is still a lot of pain where she is concerned. I try to get beyond it all. Then it rears its ugly head again.
She didn't believe the awful things done to me by some of the men in our family. That broke my heart. She still mentions these people like they were good people. Believe me they were not. How can she do this? I guess she just can't face it. But it hurts all the same.
She also breaks my heart by refusing to remember how she used to beat me as a child. She says she never hit me. Because I was very good. If I did something wrong all she had to do was talk to me about it.
That's not true. She would either beat me until I was black and blue. Or switch me until I was cut and bleeding. I'm not saying that kids shouldn't be spanked. But to me these were beatings and not right. All the therapists I explained this too. Have said that it wasn't right.
I try not to think about these things. The worst about it all, is that she can't ask me to forgive her, of which I would. But she never asks. But with time I have forgiven her. I guess. But it hurts all the same.
Fancie |
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Posted by Fancie on 2008-02-02 13:12:06 | Rating: | Views: 54
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read the book "Divine Secrets of the YaYa Sisterhood". I think you could really connect with it.
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Posted by smileforthecamera
on 2008-02-02 13:19:14
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I think older people, people in their 80's have selective memory. Maybe because their not sure when their checking out so they just bury the bad stuff. I don't know. My daddy was the same way. He wasn't much for reminising though.
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Posted by Faith
on 2008-02-08 16:29:15
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