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My world fell apart today. The snow is melting and dirty and dark and dank. I ran outside in my sock feet.
It felt so cold. My socks got wet. The snow felt soft and smooth. But it's very deceptive. Because it can freeze off your toes and your feet. But still I kept walking with no shoes. It strangely comforted me.
My mom called him today. We had a serious problem he needed to help with. But will he.
I asked her to please ask him, if he was still drinking. But he didn't answer. She told him I still loved him. That I left because I coulldn't take it anymore, the drinking. He said, yeah. My mom told him I was crying. She started to cry. She said he sounded very subdued and sober.
I fell down on the floor crying. my eyes out. I love him and I waant him back. But only if he can end his relationship with alcoholism. And become a recovering alcoholic and not a practicing one.
I wanted to talk off the face of the earth. But my feet were so cold and wet.
I wish Craig was here to hold me in his arms. Maybe I'd feel warm and safe and loved.
I'm so very tired! I wish the floor would swallow me up forever and ever. I sit at the kitchen table. And I lived miserably ever after.
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Posted by Fancie on 2008-02-18 13:53:15 | Rating: | Views: 77
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It sounds very sad. I hope things work out for you.
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Posted by Faith
on 2008-02-19 11:34:09
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I hope you feels better now. You can't do anything (to help him unless he wants help. You have to live your life to the fullest yourself!
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Posted by Melody
on 2008-02-20 01:23:48
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we need to work on that broken heart
keep praying
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Posted by roe
on 2008-02-25 18:41:45
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