I have one sister who is 4 years younger than me.  She's been through her own ups and downs. Faced many challenges and continues to be challenged in her life.

Let me say right here that we've NEVER been close.  We've never had that close relationship that sisters should. That is nobody's fault, it is just the way we both were.
In many ways we are similar, in many ways we are completely opposite. 
We move in different circles, we dance to a different beat.
I (was) married and have 2 children, she is painfully single and has never married, and never wants kids.
She trusts nobody and only has a couple of close friends.  I have let myself trust and have been rewarded with good close friends.
She sees things in black and white, I see the shades of grey in between.

So we are different! We are very different.

Today I received an email from her - Subject "FAMILY".
In the body she wrote :-

Why is it you wanna reconnect with our estranged cousins, but don't want to reconnect with me?
All you have to do is call me, email me.. Invite me over.. That would mean a lot to me.. I want us to be friends, not just sisters.. But it takes two..

She is referring to my Auntie & cousins (whom I've never met) who I contacted through Facebook.
Her words make me angry they make me mad, they make me ashamed to say I believe in FAMILY VALUES.
Is she not my family?? Why then do I have a such an issue letting her into my life?

Is it because

- She lectures me about my life and does not hear my responses to her?
- She is often blunt and prickly as a pear when dealing with people?
- She is so sure of things that she thinks her way is the ONLY right way?
- When we've had heated discussions (especially on MSN) and I dispute her logic she leaves the chat suddenly?
- She was over here last week - just popped in and wouldn't take the time to spend a moment with Master 5 who wanted to show her how far he'd got on a PS2 game??
- She is very quick to tell me that my children have ignored her or said something "inappropriate" or "not expected" when she sees them at our parents house?
- When I was trying to figure out my financial problems due to having to pay out the ex- and our Dad got involved, she told me if he has a heart attack due to the stress of the situation - It would be MY fault!!!
- When I've asked her to babysit for me or watch the kids she will let me know that she'd prefer to GO OUT with friends.
- When she has her friends and is going out she couldn't care less about doing things with me.
- When (like right now) she has a falling out with her friends, she expects me to change my lifestyle albeit temporarily.
- She thinks I need to get out and have the kids baby-sat ...
- She thinks I need to force their father to have them overnight - when he doesn't want them and they don't want to go with him
- She thnks that ALL men are "players" and I should NOT bother looking for another.
- She CUT me OFF short when I tried to tell her a little bit about an American Man I was talking to online.
Yet she often "hooks" up with Australian men online.
- She gives me her opinion of my friends, often only voicing criticsm then expects me to invite her out when I'm going out with her.

I have emailed her back, I know I know - I should've called her, but I just don't have the energy tonight.  I tried to use alot of I FEEL and I BELIEVE words rather than saying YOU do this and YOU do that.... I'm not sure how she'll take it, but I do know she'll come back at me first chance she gets... hopefully not via the telephone at least not tonight anyway.

I'm not sure .. I know FAMILY is the most important ... but we've been down this track, and we just don't work.  We are toooo different, we are both set in our ways, and I won't be told by a person who has never had kids that I am not parenting right! No Thanks.