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| If you asked How I was today
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If you were a friend and you saw me today, you'd probably say
"Hi, how are you?"
I'd probably smile and say, "I'm fine."
But I'm not fine, I want to scream, I want to cry I want to bury myself somewhere where nobody could find me.
I am struggling to deal with my reality. Oh it's easy to hide it, and pretend all is well. But in my heart i'm broken.
I want another life, I wish I could go back and marry a better man.
Not the one that I did marry - not the one who took my happiness away.
He's stolen my family life.
He's left me with 2 beautiful children to raise and a financial burden that is starting to eat me away.
I don't want to lose our house, the one he moved us to before walking out 5 months later. We doubled our mortgage so he could leave with his girlfriend.
I don't think he is normal - but that doesn't help me, doesn't help his children.
I want to move on and have met a nice guy, but why would anybody want to be involved with me and my problems?
I try to keep them to myself because I don't want people to think I have baggage.
Ask yourself would you want to get messed up with someone that is being stripped of all savings and is struggling to meet the budget?
I have a good job and I believe I am a good person. I deserve better - don't we all??
So why do I feel so useless and discarded at the moment?
How do I meet my financial burden without ruining the next 10 years of my life??
CRAPPY CRAPPY CRAPPY |
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Posted by EasyToSay on 2008-01-08 02:06:00 | Rating: | Views: 114
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Hang in there honey. Read my new blog sadmom. I'm new to this but we just have to get it out.
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Posted by sadmom
on 2008-01-08 02:08:30
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I have been where u r to a certain extent. My ex left me with alot of financial shit. My kids r grown but it is still hard. U need to just think about yr kids and u, what is best 4 u rite now. He is not worth a shit, just do what u have to do 4 u and yr kids, u will feel better doing it on yr own!
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Posted by holly64
on 2008-01-08 02:11:06
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I agree, hang in there. You have the strength to survive this. Someone WILL want you, even with all your baggage. Just take it one step at a time.
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Posted by faithalexsmum
on 2008-01-09 06:02:54
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