Hold the phone, he’s not spamming me, he’s just a nasty little virus that has got into my “motherboard” .

Today I got an email from FOTY. He was at my home last night spending time with our children. I was nice to him – in that I smiled, looked him in the eye and took the time to say hello. I spoke with respect to him in front of our children. I was kind to him. Then (as soon as I could) I kindly escorted him out the door (I had things to do, life to live!!!)

The email today was titled “Saturday”, and I knew it had to have the bombshell in it. After the two insignificant emails he sent the last two days, the cynic in me knew it was only a matter of time.

So I opened it and it read: -

Hi,
I am moving house this weekend and I had organised to get most of it done this Friday. Unfortunately the mate with the truck has just told me that he now can now only help on Saturday.
I am sorry for this; it was not what I had planned.
Yours sincerely,
FOTY


Of course reading between the lines he’s moving in with JS … it’s only natural (as suggested by my sweet friend) they are engaged.  Which isn’t what makes me mad. The "us" part of the relationship is finished, it is now only about our children.

What makes me fume is that he was at my home last night.
Why couldn’t he have told me?
Why couldn’t he have told our children?
 
He doesn’t offer an address - again I only need to know this so I know where my children go with him.

So I ponder this as the sinking feeling takes its effect.
My stomach gets heavy and my eyes show disappointment.
I feel numbness and some sorrow.
I wait for it to leave me, the hurt it always brings along.

I’m waiting to feel like “me” again and know what’s important in my head & my heart.

I know what I have to now do, call Miss 8 at her Nana’s and explain the situation.
FOTY hasn't even told Miss 8 or Master 4 that's he is engaged to JS, it's been a month since I found out!

I ask her if she would like me to suggest her Daddy see Master 4 & her on the Sunday instead
(knowing there is a possibility that he won’t make himself available – as once again he hasn’t offered an alternative).
But Miss 8 says she’d rather just skip it.

Then she breaks my heart. She asks me,
“Is Daddy moving? Home?”

I tell her no, he’s not moving home, and feel sad that he didn’t tell her himself.

“Why didn’t Daddy tell me last night?” she follows, almost reading my mind.

“Oh he must have forgotten.” I tell her, knowing full well that moving house is a huge thing, not something you are likely to just “forget”.  Plus he is renting and his annual lease is up on the 13th April.

I’m still feeling a bit numb as yet another nail in the coffin of my marriage is tapped in.

I remind myself what I already know - he’s ordinary - he’s nothing special,
Then I daydream about my awesome, super hero, extraordinary man
who is no doubt planning our future,  and for that I’m eternally grateful.