Censorship. It conjures up bad images immediately. “No one’s gonna tell ME what I can read/see/watch/hear/think”. Yet, I do believe that censorship has its place. However, my wife-to-be pointed out an article she read about a furore over the TV show Californication and its inappropriateness. There is an understandable reaction that says “Don’t watch it if you don’t like it”.

Now, this is a fair call for those who are watching it so that they can be disgusted. Those idiots will always be around. But I think in all fairness, the ads give fair warning of the content, the time slot alludes to it, and the name itself is a bit of a heads up (no pun intended: OR I’m extremely witty, depending on your outlook). I DO think the person who changes channels and hits the show at a particularly expressive point DOES INDEED have the right to complain. I can look up any manner of porn on the internet, at my choosing. But despite the many stories of such, I’ve never inadvertently come across it. But a free program that displays what others may view as obscene direct into my house is cause for complaint, and I feel they are just in complaining.

HOWEVER, touch my show and I’ll break your fingers! I lurve it. Being a bloke, I naturally consider myself to be irresistible to women, and as mentioned in my first blog I consider myself to be somewhat of a writer (a tricky thing to pull off, considering I haven’t written for years). So I like to think I can sympathise/empathise with the main character. Despite the fact I am fat, ugly, and considerably less successful with the ladies. Besides, the show has given me a term that I will cherish for the rest of my life, which as I don’t want to be flagged as inappropriate, I will merely term as C-B. A term he uses to describe a physical reaction of a sexually excited female. I can now die happy, my life is fulfilled.

But, back to the censorship issue. Yes, I said that person has the right to complain. I truly feel they do. But does their complaint have the right to sway the producers, or the censorship board, to take action? Hell No! We who want to watch the show have our rights too. And, frankly, it comes down to numbers. I’m not saying that more want to watch the show than don’t, but that more want to watch the show than are inadvertently offended by it. If we don’t stand up for what we want to watch, then soon all our good shows will only be available on subscription services.

In Australia we have this ridiculous issue pop up every year with the TV show Big Brother. They have an “Up Late” edition, which has a string of warnings as a pre-cursor, has been renowned for years for its nudity and inappropriate language, and yet STILL gets showered with criticism and outrage, and bah-humbugging politicians. Every year they talk about banning it, or fining channel ten for displaying such footage. I just don’t see why.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that anything goes. But I’ve watched a PG movie with my littlie’s (back when they were littler than they are now) and seen a woman step out of a shower fully naked (as one tends to be when one steps out of the shower). I wasn’t offended, but I was shocked that it was allowed, and quite surprised. My kids weren’t offended or shocked, but were distressed at not knowing how they were supposed to react so as not to be in trouble. I did some checking, and it turned out that as long as the nudity was not of a sexual or adult nature in any way, then it was all good. I guess that was the thing with PG movies. The “P” has to “G”, but so often we just think that PG must be good for kids. And that simple failing (the rating TELLS you that Parent Guidance is recommended) is at the heart of the matter. Californication is rated MA15+. Do we watch that and simply think that so many tame shows are MA15+ that this will be merely another, and then get unreasonably offended when it isn’t? MA15+ means it is designed for mature, adult audiences.

Whilst I’m on the subject of ratings, let me take this opportunity to have my little rant, my little indignancy. I went to the movies recently, something I don’t do very often. Not because I don’t like movies, I love them. But I’m a fussy prick. I like a clean, focused screen, good quality sound. I get neither of these at the cinemas. I try not to, but I end up only seeing the marks on the screen, the hiss out of a speaker, or, worse ever, an out of phase speaker. Oh, the humanity!

But here in Australia the Government moves slowly. We allow previews of movies we haven’t rated yet. So, we rate the previews (trailers) in the meantime. Though I can handle this (despite having problems with it), what irritates me beyond all reason (yes, I can be quite a nutter at times) is the small writing down the bottom of the screen, this tells us that the OFLC (Office of Film and Literature Classification) has approved the screening.

What bugs me, (and, yes, probably only me) is that when they show the classification of a movie the small writing tells you who rated it (OFLC). But when they haven’t yet rated the movie, only the trainer, their small writing has added underneath “informing your choices”. Aaaarrrrgggghhhh!!! HOW can they say that specifically on a movie they haven’t gotten around to checking yet, but are happy to advertise?

Umm, actually, seeing as I’m in nutter confession, I feel the need to unburden myself of my number one irritant.

I really should be medicated, or have oxygen standing nearby before I address this issue, but here goes.

I have a pet hate of people who say “Oh” when they mean “Zero”. You can blame my brother for this, though he won’t know why. But despite driving me nuts, that’s not it. There’s a phone number that adults can ring to get confidential help to assist them in learning to read and right better, The phone number is 1300 6555 06. This phone number is sung in the TV ad as “one three double oh, six triple five, oh six”. How can they do that? This is the number for people who try to teach you to read and write properly! Not a sterling advertisement. God it pushes my buttons. Where’s a small dog I can kick? “Oh” is a letter; “zero” is a number. How hard can it be?

Sorry, I’m back again. I’m medicated and feeling much calmer.

Now, despite the fact that this ad drives me nuts, I have not rung to complain, not written to them outlining my umbrage. Why? Because I don’t need it taken off the TV, I just ignore it.

Why is that so hard for some people to do?