| View Blog
|
|
|
|
My preludes- to the truth.
Poetic escape designed to .....release emotions that will hinder me...if I do not release them.
Seeking a new song.
My old song is humming out of tune.
Bleeding heart...again...that needs no healing.
My mind is complete in thinking in technical terms.
When did the world become so predictable?
Everyone and everything ... so predictable.
Aren't they?
I cannot even watch tv anymore, I can write the ending to every movie and show, I know the ending every time.
Ever feel like a foreigner?
A foreigner in your own land?
To feel lost.
How many feel lost in their own homes?
I have come to the conclusion that we were meant to feel lost.
We could never be found, if we were never lost.
Someone please....journey with me....someone please find me. (smirk)
Do not pity me...pity has no honor.
Take my hand and be bare in soul with me.
No more plays.
No more movies.
Let us write a new ending.
Be given a new beginning.
What inspires us to live?
What inspires us to do anything we do?
Love moves me.
A never ending presence.
No one can see the wind....but we surely see the power of it.
Love is like that.
Like the wind.
It moves you on the inside...like a quickening.
I love people like that....God...I love people.
Yet, I equally, do not trust people.
We all betray each other- in this crazy lil' thing called love.
There is no reason for it...but ... for human nature....we are cavemen.
God, I am sick of the pain.
Though, I welcome it.
Paradox
Never one opinion.
I come to myself for a second opinion.
Run to...that secret place....for a new song.
God lives there.
mmm
A new song...that phrase..." A New Song"..
It moves me.
I am about to venture on a new journey in life.
I truly feel like an adolescent girl, just coming into adulthood.
Coming here solidifies it....writing publicly is ...my..
"Spiritual Evolution Journal."
Copyrighting my emotions to God.
I am truly free from the pain....I feel it....but it has transformed into a beautiful pain.
I have felt every kind of pain that most haunts the human soul.
I survived.
I am a strong spirit.
My new song.
Pain no longer hurts.
It defines me.
There is no excuse for a hateful soul.
There is a way to transform pain into unconditional love.
A state of mind, that no matter what I have been through....I sit content in thoughts of peace...and love for ....those I should hate.
For so long, I thought this place did not exist.
Another Garden of Eden tale.
Yet, it has become one and the same.
It does...this secret place -I rave about...it does exist.
My Garden Of Eden...in my Soul.
Now, I must leave the garden, as the story goes.
Goodbye to my spiritual cocoon.
I am ready to face the world.
With a Brave Heart.
*Doesn't that sound noble?*
I truly am going to be a scholar.
I am going back to school.
Autumn will bring a whole new way of life.
One that I am familiar with.
To drown in wisdom.
Literally, I am immersing my difficult soul into study.
I must keep myself out of trouble.
A busy mind...has no time for wasted thoughts.
We are all song writers you know?
I just wrote my own song.
Face set in smiling stone.
|
|
Posted by DifficultSoul on 2008-04-22 05:02:28 | Rating: | Views: 200
|
|
| |
|
|
| Blog Comments
|
|
|
|
Hey thats weird, i am going back to school too (well home school)?!
Someone may not know that you are lost and in need of finding,someone may not realise that they are welcome to look for you x
Just a thought xx
|
|
Posted by missmarie
on 2008-04-22 13:47:51
|
|
|
|
And...
i too feel lost in my own home, i never feel as though i am 'there' yet, wherever there may be, and i have never felt right, always alone, even in someones arms, because really, we are always alone, never completely with someone, we would have to literally be inside someones mind to have total company, when we close our eyes at night, or have a moment alone to think, we realise how alone we are, but if you can enjoy your own company, and talk in your mind for hours (as i can he he) then it is fine to be alone, and chose who we let in and how much we share with them xx
|
|
Posted by missmarie
on 2008-04-22 13:51:36
|
|
|
|
I feel like I don't fit in my home. I should have written this before. I hide alot of things from myself about myself. I have a hard time knowing exactly how I feel about my home life. I know I'm bored that's my fault.
I don't fit in mostly because I am living with people who don't seem to want me there and I feel like 'well if you didn't want me here why did you invite me'. I am living around people that make no sense in a city that makes no sense to me. I feel a little more welcomed by the city since the spring and things are blooming & it's so beautiful. I guess what I feel is displaced. Does that make sense? You go so deep examining you soul and the world around. You sound like a philosopher. Have you read or studied philosophy?
|
|
Posted by Faith
on 2008-04-22 15:58:08
|
|
|
|
|
I went back to school and I don't regret any of it. I would love to cowrite this new song with you, LftH. Maybe I can "loan" you some of my A papers. hehe
|
|
Posted by Pauligan
on 2008-04-22 18:39:15
|
|
|
|
Love drives me as well. The quest for it, and now as fate would have it, enjoying it.
I am in a correspondence school, to write my own novel. My questions are always, should I...do I want to? I can't seem to help the doubt. I wonder if you are going to a school such as a building where all are there to learn?
You could teach them all something!:)
|
|
Posted by smilinirisheyes
on 2008-04-22 21:17:48
|
|
|
|
In your soul are infinitely precious things that cannot be taken from you. I like that song~
I hope all is well for you.
|
|
Posted by Sober
on 2008-04-23 07:27:54
|
|
|
|
|
Every day I too feel alone. A dress rehersal of what is to become of me. Wishing you the best in everything you do. Never be ashamed of the logic that is in you and expressed so beautifully as always..Peace and love to you on your new journay.
|
|
Posted by Hollis
on 2008-04-23 09:07:55
|
|
|
|
|
I think it's great that you are going back to school. What will you be studying? I sometimes feel that way like I know what's going to happen in a movie, like there's no real challenge. Interesting post.
|
|
Posted by prelude2it
on 2008-04-23 11:06:57
|
|
|
|
This post spoke to my heart. Like most who have already spoken I feel alone in my own home as well (or displaced as someone so eloquently put it). Interesting thought that we were meant to feel lost so we can be found. Not really surprising that we feel lost as we are sojourners, in a foreign land, making our way to Heaven. I shared the following quote with someone else today and it seems to fit your post as well with you embarking on a new journey. May the melody of your "new song" forever bring joy to your heart. Peace.
"Though no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending." -- Carl Bard
|
|
Posted by ColoradoDreamin
on 2008-04-24 00:02:00
|
|
|
|
Just spent the last half hour catching up on your posts, I am always amazed by them and this time it was no different. I was thinking to myself, it must hurt to think as deep as you do.
I missed you my friend!
Peace
|
|
Posted by trevorjohn
on 2008-04-24 11:11:16
|
|
|
|
|
|
Email This to a Friend 
