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| Sieving the Dreams |
Hi all,
Dreams are very cool, but also very, very mysterious, especially when induced by alcohol or really hot chili. When my dreams get freaky, which is usually any day that ends with a "y," I feel almost obligated to try to figure it all out. It never works, but there are times when a certain bit recurs, and I am yet again mystified by that recurring part.
Maybe God is speaking to me through my dreams. If so, then I must ask, why the fuck can't he just sit me down over my morning cup of coffee and explain whatever He wants me to know? Maybe my subconscious picked up on something that my vague sensory perceptions didn't register as important at the time. This seems more likely, as I usually go through the day in a sort of mental fog when I'm not working on a specific task.
Then again, maybe my dreams are becoming a sort of montage of what I see and feel, and it puts it all together to form something completely new, a synthesis of my day and my life. Whatever it is, I find that I have too many dreams that are unsettling, dreams in which I wake up regretting the end of the dream and the beginning of the day. They are not necessarily happy dreams, but they are dreams worth resolving. I never seem to resolve anything in my dreams.
The common elements are: people from my childhood, a stark distinction between light space and dark space, background people are always smiling in a sort of creepy way, I am always in a rush, and when I get to where I'm going, I find that this is not where I need to be. Pretty freaky, huh?
On the other hand, I appreciate my dreams, do not shy from trying to recapture the images or disentangle their arcane messages. If I were smarter, I would be able to figure them out to a certain extent, or if I had more faith in their function as a deliverer of messages. If I were a little more stable (which, in itself, is a vague and unsettling term), I would blow them off and go about being stable all day long. But I am neither of these things. I am not smart. I am not stable. Truthfully, I like it that way. The dreams are an adventure, and since my travel time this past year has been nil, it's a free if somewhat weird vacation. Lots of baggage fees, though...
My day has been quite uneventful today. Not, in fact, worth writing about; however, I still have tonight. Tonight, I might have one of those dreams that buzz around my head all day long the next day, causing me to bump into my desk and ask pardon from the trashcan. Yeah, I love those days, no matter how melancholy I feel. I feel alive and poignant.
And that's the goal, right? Geez, I hope so! I've been working on that premise my whole life...
DS
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Posted by DentedSyke on 2009-01-11 15:47:16 | Rating: | Views: 41
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