Thoughts.com Blogs - The Suicide Chronicals

Posted by
tonyrayhutchison
on 2007-12-16 12:17:14


Hey, I'll follow the story, I'm a huge proponent for euthinaisa. One problem though, if you do it in the winter time, then you'll be another "seasonal depression" statistic, and I dont think you are but then this post would look like a "cry for help", maybe you could hold off till summer. And who knows you might find that writting about suicide will be better than actually doing it.

Posted by
tonyrayhutchison
on 2007-12-16 12:20:21


Plus I cant follow to well if I cant veiw your profile, and from the speed in which your veiw count is climbing, others are interrested too.

Posted by
Wayne
on 2007-12-16 12:24:42


Yea I think I would rather just write about it too, funny I didn't ever think about it till I got over 50 too...I just stick around to see what the hell will happen next now..think about it man...it's not like something you can have a do over on...

Posted by
missmarie
on 2007-12-16 12:46:36


i agree with the lads, i think you should at least stick around til the summer honey, i get the impression your going to be pretty popular around here, so we might be able to give you some reasons to stick around for even longer xx go on give us a chance to get to know you properly xx

Posted by
missmarie
on 2007-12-16 12:48:26


i also agree that, if we cant view your profile how can we make friends with you xxx go on put us on your friends list xx

Posted by
missmarie
on 2007-12-16 12:49:18


sorry robswife you arent one of the lads are you xx oops

Posted by
jason
on 2007-12-16 13:08:37


please visit these websites and talk with someone. there is so much to live for. http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ http://www.save.org/ or call this toll free number 1-800-273-TALK

Posted by
DifficultSoul
on 2007-12-16 13:09:44


Emotions....all of them...are necessary. All of life's happenings are necessary. We live to learn. Jealousy....whether we have it shot at us....or we shoot it at another.....eventually causes us to admire. Hate....teaches us to Love. Tears of pain.....rains down a shower that makes us long for joy. Anger pushes us around like a bully....and makes us long for happiness. Self-pity......takes us down a pitiful road...and at the end of it....is a banner of Self- Love. We all want to escape the bad things in life...that is a wasted mind set. We tend to reject and wish for the hard feelings in our emotional makeup to end....or never wanting to experience them at all. That kind of thinking comes from a naive state of mind....for in all things...our character is being completed. Without the hard times in life....the good times in life would have no meaning at all. Our spirits are designed to be formed....as tools are formed in the heat of fire. The hard things in life.....is the fire that we must go through...to form an evened out and completed character. Some of the darkest times in my life were filled with anger, bitterness, betrayal, jealousy, self-pity, and feelings of giving up on life, because I thought I could just not take anymore of the pain. Just when I thought all hope was gone....those hard emotions that I was feeling...and other people were projecting upon me....caused my spirit to birth a Godly Anger...and I fought back. I fought back with all of their opposites. I tried the route with paybacks first, of course, we all tend to want to repay evil with evil....and I surely did some of that. It was only when I started paying back those hurtful emotions....to myself and to others....paying back evil with good....is when I truly formed a character that I can be proud of. I would not be who I am today without all of that pain. If I lived a life of all flowers, joy, and Dr. Feelgood emotions...I would have no substance or depth to my soul. Those hard times have given me compassion and understanding for others who face them. It has given me knowledge and stamina to encourage others to keep wading through those dark thoughts and feelings....because surely at the end of that dark road....is a bright and glorious light. A light of self discovery. A light that teaches us that....this is what life is all about. Life is beautiful in all things....it is just that when we are blinded by darkness....we cannot see that truth. I am here holding a lantern in front of you....to light that dark road you may be on. I walked that road...I am still walking that road...up ahead you will find your own lantern. Until you find your own light....I have come back to share the glow of my own. Our births and our deaths even have meaning. We were born to die. We die to be born again. All things have a purpose.

Posted by
DifficultSoul
on 2007-12-16 13:12:08


Why rush death along? It is all of our destiny. Maybe you just felt like giving up because you have had no one to walk with you. I, and all who just left you comments, are willing to walk with you. I hope you reconsider...it would be a shame for you to miss out on this shot at life. May you find peace dear saddened heart.

Posted by
DifficultSoul
on 2007-12-16 13:15:15


This next writing that I am going to post here... is NOT me telling you to go ahead and just kill yourself. I designed it to shout some sense at you. Peace.

Posted by
DifficultSoul
on 2007-12-16 13:16:01


SUICIDE WILL KILL YOU! Here is a gun. It is loaded and ready. Feel the pain of a bullet in the brain! Do it. Kill yourself. Quit talking about it. Do it. DIE! Go lay in the ground and rot. Go 6 feet into the earth and never set foot upon the dirt again. Never wake up again. Never smile again. Never laugh again. Never feel the sunshine on your face again. Never taste icecream again. Never make love again. Never hear a good song again. Never walk along the beach and stare out at the beauty of creation again. Never eat a good steak again. Never dance again. Never drive a fast car again. Never be in the presence of a burning scented candle again. Never kiss again. Never see your loved ones again. Never open your eyes and see the amazing sky again....Never Live again! Go ahead.....Die. I am going to LIVE!!!![

Posted by
DifficultSoul
on 2007-12-16 13:18:14


Live! Not for me. For you. It is our purpose. Your purpose is to live. Our pain is part of life. It takes a stronger person to live than one who commits suicide. May you find strength. May you find strength. May you find strength. May you find life. Peace.

Posted by
DifficultSoul
on 2007-12-16 14:04:09


I am back. I pitied you for a minute and now I regret it. I have compassion for you that life has been hard for you and you do not enjoy your life, but I have no compassion for what you are plotting and planning. You are plotting and premeditating MURDER! Suicide is Murdering your own body. Would I feel pity for someone if I came across a blog saying: I have a bottle of pills here that I am going to crush up and slip into my husband's drink on December 31. I have felt for some time now that he deserves to die. I have prayed for him to die for a very long time. Hell no, I would not feel sorry for a blog that said that. You have murderous intent in your heart, and it is against your own body. That tells me you hate yourself. That tells me that you hate other people. You cannot love anyone else if you do not love yourself! I do not pity you. If you have parents...you are premeditating their child's murder. If you have a spouse, you are premeditating their love's murder. If you have children, you are premeditating the murder of their parent. If you have siblings, you are premeditating their sibling's murder. If you want to die leaving that legacy behind...then I truly feel sorry for you. But, I do not pity what you are planning. If you want to be remembered as a murderer in the History Books of the Universe...that is your perogative. I care not who disagrees with me. I wrote this with the intention to hopefully make you see what you are really doing. May you find a heart, before you do such things to your loved ones, or to yourself. May this slap you right in the face and make you see what you are really saying in this cruel Suicide Chronicles diary. You are letting us all know that you have murderous intentions in your heart.

Posted by
SRD
on 2007-12-16 14:07:32


I know that life can be very difficult and full of pain. Please know that you are not alone for many have walked and many times crawled in this dark path that seems to be etched in troubles and tribulation but please hang on because one thing about life is that it never stays the same and although you are feeling depressed today does not mean that it will be like this forever. You see, true happiness must be birth from within and from a sense of self worth. Although I don't know you personally, I know you are a valuable person of worth because the earth was blessed with your presence and God does not make mistakes or junk. You are a precious soul that has a purpose in life even if now it seems obscure through all the trials and tribulation. The lack of employment or money can not subtract from your obvious worth that is given to you upon your arrival on this planet. Please don't give up on yourself and please even more importantly, don't give up on God. He loves you and he will take care of you. I have had times of plenty and times of poverty and through it all, Jesus have been there for me. My basic needs have always been met in spite of my dire circumstances. The steps of my life can be traced with the footprints in the soil of pain and joy. And to be honest with you there have been more pain than happiness as the world would define it, but one thing I know and that is God will never leave you or forsake you regardless of your state or status in life. I want you to know that I have prayed for you and will continue to pray for you beyond today. Prayers does change things believe it or not and I have faith enough for the both of us. I have confidence in a loving God who does hear and answers prayers. God is known as Jehovah Nissa and this name means that God is bigger than the giants in your life and he has seen your situation and has prepared for it ahead of time and if you check out too soon - you will not see the manifestation of how God is able to take what appears impossible in our eyes and reduce that mountain in our lives into a plain path and take us through on solid ground. I know personally, for this is my testimony. I seen it with my own eyes - the impossible places in life that seems hopeless and Lord and Behold, HOPE pops out of the darkest night. Please don't give up and I will be praying for you.

Posted by
Nard2145
on 2007-12-16 14:46:50


I want you to know there is someone that been in your shoes. I have tired it and found out it not the way ,Now I could say a lot of things to you hoping that something will work,but all in all it still is in your hand so I want you to know that everyone here that writing to you really care about you and don't want this to happen so when I heard about you I wanted you to know I care too and I feel you pain I'm not working now and feel as if every job I had was taken away by unfair people who for there own Evil ways tried very hard to bring me to the point were you are now. I don't know you. But what I do know your hurting very much and this is your way to holler without being known, You do know God and you want to feel Him in your life you do, Please remember when your at your lowest point He's there he there now so please open your heart to hear Him and then open your eyes for here you have friends here that really care and you can count on I don't know you but GOD PLEASE LOOK AT YOUR HURTING CHILD AND GRANT HER PEACE AND PROTECT HER FROM THIS PAIN I PRAY GOD LESS YOU AND KEEP YOU IN YOUR DARKEST HOUR,

Posted by
missmarie
on 2007-12-16 15:32:40


who flagged this? oh come on why is pain and turmoil inapropriate. you have made friends here already, i thinkmaybe you should talk to us, go on you know you want to, we are all here if you want to private messsage us or talk in the forums or even here, tell us a little about yourself, please love and peace xxxxx

Posted by
Diaphonous_Me
on 2007-12-16 16:23:53


honestly sweetheart, message me, i will not judge, just care

Posted by
scotslad60
on 2007-12-16 18:34:20


First of all, well said Jason. She might need help not opinions. Re the blog - I hope I'm wrong, but you could be a journalist. This is one of the most attention grabbing titles/headlines I have seen in any of the blogs. Maybe you should consider a career in journalism, you might think you've explored all avenues, but there is plenty of scope yet.

Posted by
Gwatlan
on 2007-12-16 21:12:34


For those who are thinking about committing suicide, please don't do it. Help can be just a phone call away (See Jason's comment above). What you need is not death but profesional help dan support from family and friends.So talk to some one, do not keep it to yourself.

Posted by
DifficultSoul
on 2007-12-17 03:45:04


Did my Shock Therapy work? Are you still alive? I hope so. I hope I made you upset enough to stop and think. If you are angry at me, then at least you are feeling something again. I really do care.

Posted by
Rajah1116
on 2007-12-17 09:26:56


Hi there, this is a VERY well written blog! I hope that you don't make this decision to end your life, it always gets dark, but there is light, we here at thoughts are a very caring and supporting bunch, I have made some wonderful friends here, they have brought me out of many a funk with their humor and support, please, try to stick it out with us by your side!

Posted by
roe
on 2007-12-21 12:15:52


God does not have his favorites!!! Nothing is ever what it seems from the outside looking in. What you perceive someones life to be is only your personal view, not reality. That being said, I hope the sheer number of people who are reaching out to you will make you reconsider what you are about to do. I think because you finally have a plan you are fooling yourself believing that maybe taking your own life will finally end your pain. I believe the pain that comes after suicide is much worse than any pain you might feel on this earth. Pain on earth is only temporary, pain in hell is eternal. A lot of people gave you a number of suggestions and offered to help you if only you reach out. People are even praying for you if you are too wounded to pray for yourself. Why not open your broken and beaten heart Let them in to help you Make that your new plan, and perhaps you will begin to make some progress and possibly even start to feel better... It doesnt always have to be this way, today is only one of those days, not forever. And another thing, life is a test, we are all given different assignements, and we will be graded individually. I think it's a lot like a diving competition, the judge takes the degee of difficulty into consideration. I will pray for you, let us know if you are considering a change of plans, Dec 31st could be a new start instead of what you had in mind.

Posted by
roe
on 2007-12-21 12:27:13


Knock Knock me again I just noticed something, you have not left any comments on other peoples blogs, look at how many people responded to you, which leads me to believe you have not read anyone elses post, this is only an assumption, and not a judgement, but if its true, put the word, depression, in the search box and see what pops up, or think of another related word. You will be amazed to know, you are not the only one suffering. I dont say this to try to make you feel better or worse, just to let you know, you are not alone.