In an earlier post, I expressed my little violet problem, but what I didn't tell you is that it's not just violets I'm battling here. There are also daisies and dandelions EVERYWHERE! It's a friggin' nightmare! I've spent days out there yanking and digging and cussing, and I was getting nowhere. Because His Lordship (the tree-hugger) is a staunch defender of life in any form, and, in the interest of maintaining a peachful home life, I am unable to launch a full nuclear attack on my lawn. No chemical warfare, no napalm...nuthin'! Sigh...
I was on the brink of just tossing in the trowel and going native, when the most amazing thing happened. I was out at the garden centre looking for ammo or advice or sympathy...anything, when I spotted the most amazing thing! It was one of those moments where a stray ray of sunlight blasts through the clouds and angels sing....
A weed widget! Oh, this thing is AWESOME!!! I don't know if you've ever seen the movie Terminator 2, but there's a scene in there where Arnold picks up this HUMUNGUS gun and gets this look on his face. If a facial expression can say "Oh HELL yeah!" that was the one! Well picture that on MY face when I hefted this thing up for the first time. It's absolutely beautiful! It's big and solid and nasty-looking! It has a big beefy shovel handle on one end it, and on the other end, there are four snarly serated blades, a clampadoodle thing and a foot pedal! So you just ram the business end into the weed, stomp on the foot pedal, and pull! Good-bye weed! Hosta la vista, baby! And the best part? It's got a pump-action weed chucker, just like a shotgun!! NOW we're talkin'!!
I'm finally beginning to believe I can win this war. I feel powerful now! So, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go and don my camo gear and my kevlar and get some weeding done....but...
C'mon, say it with me....
I'll be back!! :)
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