Future everything is always so complicated. Or at least it is to the mind. I am applying for a new job and I am screaming on the inside....... Will you find out that maybe just maybe I was late more than three times this year. But I want to do better. this time i am serious. But somehow just like your credit, your past is some footprint to who you may be now. Why can't I just start over. Its my decision right. To come to work everyday. To be good with my money. And all though it might be just a tad bit hard. I am willing to go the extra mile. and on top of that. I can do this job. Can do it better than anyone you know. Why because i can change myself. Is that really a scary thought?  I can do it you know!!!!!

I am not lying to you. I know that it may seem like I am because well the books say that I left that job because I was...maybe high. I left that job because....me and my girlfriend were making love. But what you don't understand is that... I was going through some things back then. Needing to be free of taking care of everything so perfectly...but if you go back 2.5 years.. you will see that I was responsible. Even when partying. Because I still love my baby. And well we drink wine some nights. Beer others....we make love until at least 11pm.  But we get to sleep. Even when we can't sleep in the same bed and we really really need that part. We do what we have to do, because this is about my future.....

I know it doesn't appear like I am serious about this, but one day it happens.  You have to know what I am talking about.. If you have not experienced it... then you have seen it on one of your favorite movies.  The person is awakened and have a greater force in which they are driven. That is normality for me. Its for a house with a room for my baby, she likes to do the computer thing. I am working on a whole new me.. Why you asked? Because I see what I can have if I commit to my choices and I really really want this job because my future is calling me and I am ready for it now.  You know when its time and today is that time. So i am going to pray to GOd that you understand my journey... and give me the chance... because I really really want this job.