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I mentioned my altered book. It is actually my second as I started one a while back and since I am doing a new one I pulled it out again so I can work on both. I did a lot more research this time and so the second one is a lot different than the first, but they are supposed to be unique. The first one I pretty much just covered pages with paper scraps and a few drawings. It is pretty boring which is OK because I can continue to work on it and make it wow!
The second is a journey about my life and thoughts andso far has been pretty dark. I hope that it gets brighter as I go on – as I certainly hope I can say the same about my life.
I think it is hard whenever you honestly examine yourself and see the real you. For instance I have a page on self image. Now I know that I should feel good no matter what I look like and it’s what’s inside that counts. My brain knows these things. But I have a low self image in my heart. I am and mostly always have been overweight. Don’t get me wrong, I know a lot of beautiful larger women and men, their personalities show through and I envy their beautiful curves. But on myself I have an ingrained perception of the flabby, jelly, bumps that stick out in all the wrong places.
So I have this page in my altered book about self image and just working out the rough idea was hard. To realize that you feel so bad about yourself is really an eye opener. I have been adding words that describe who I think I am and I hope that when I am done I can look at what I don’t like and work on it, be it changing what I can or coming to terms with what I can’t.
I think there are basically two types of people (with subgroups of course) either stagnant or unwilling to change or learn and constantly evolving, learning, changing people. I hope I am in the later category. I also hope that I never stop trying new things or learning. This brings me back to the altered book. Another new craft, I need like an extra hole in the head but it is not really new. I have been using paints, sketch, glue and writing for years. Just not in the same piece. In the spirit of altered art I am not buying new supplies and using what I have already, not that it would make a dent in what I have. Of course there is that circle cutter I want, and that gel glue, and those cool pens.
Art is second nature to me; it is something I have to do. A pencil and paper are all I need and I am happy. When I get the urge to sketch or write I have to get it down. It is not always what I thought, but that is the fun of creation. A journey.
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Posted by bazile on 2008-07-09 12:27:24 | Rating: | Views: 32
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