| View Blog
|
|
|
i feel like im fighting a battle against the world, myself, everything my sanity, i hate my job, when im there im constantly thinking about what i would rather be doing, its only now im realizing iv made a big mistake, if only i could go back in time, i bet everyone wishes that at some point in life.
what's made me feel this way? well i guess iv always felt this way its just that things in life distract us from how we really feel, we bury ourselves in our jobs, watch tv, basically switch ourselves off and just waste our lives away, then every now and then something reminds us that we are not content with how things are.
im starting to think i was born 20 years to late, but iv only just realized this and now my minds trying to catch up... all at once, i feel like im going to go crazy, or my heads going to implode with all the information im trying to absorb all at once.
its like iv discovered the internet again for the first time and i cant stop surfing, taking in all the data i can, and make up for all the years i wasted playing computer games, instead why did i not think, hey these games i play..how do they do this, i remember reading early computer magasines and typing in code, why did i not get more involved in it, instead i just played games.
don't get me wrong i think playing games has been an important part of my life and has made me who i am now, how i think, well im not sure important is the right word to use, but where would i be now if i had not played games but instead used my time to learn and educated myself more and more, if I'd spent as many hours a day reading as i had playing games im sure my life would be a lot different, a better job, more money, a home of my own, "everything is connected" as iv heard.
where does intelligence come from? what makes someone more intelligent then the next person, after all are we not all made the same? can one become a genius simply by reading and learning, can we train our minds how we want with whatever knowledge we want to know or are we all limited by our genes.
i often find myself trying to invent something, i have what i call deep thinking sessions, where i try to think of something no one else ever has, am i stupid to think i would be capable to do such a thing? is this something most people do now and then? or just people like me who want to change their lives as fast as possible, like winning the lottery or something.
i often think to myself, surely this is not it, this cannot be my life, i must be destined to do something better than this, change the world somehow, make a mark. with this comes my desire for knowledge, but that bring its own problems, where do i start, am i capable of learning everything i want to, again back to where to start.. there's so much i would like to know and be able to do.
the internet is the most wonderful invention, if knowledge is the key then its starting to take shape, im sure in years to come the internet will be an even bigger part of our lives then it is now, reading about its invention makes me wish i was part of it, along with everything else that came before and after it, computers, microsoft, ebay, google, etc.
listening to a audio book about googles history makes me feel at times like im going to burst in to tears, at the moment im not sure why, i can only guess it has something to do with how im feeling inside, like iv missed out, not just because of the shear wealth its creators now have but because of what they have done and what they can now do, they have the power to change the world just like computers have done.
This reminds me of something i felt one day while using napster back in the day, i used to spend hours downloading music, if someone told you about a song or you heard a tune on the radio chances are it was on napster, so within a second of finding out the name of a artist or song title, the next second you could be listening to it, that's a powerful tool to have, and now with a search engine as good as google any subject is as accessible as this, now we just need to get past copyrights etc and the internet would be perfect, well in the quest for knowledge anyway, think of all the leaning we could do if we could search any subject and instantly read, watch or listen to all the educational material available.
without money maybe we would all be happier, then things like copyright etc might not be an issue? but then who would do all the jobs we do not want to do? the streets would be full of rubbish for starters, what would the world be like if people did not have any drive or reason to make money!
|
|
Posted by Apexs on 2007-12-14 12:55:12 | Rating: | Views: 57
|
| |
|
|
| Blog Comments
|
|
|
|
Uhh...
Did you happen to jump into my head recently? I mean, every friggin word you have said and how you said it has been in my head. . , seriously. Now I know I'm losing it. Lol. I mean, how many people could possibly be thinking the same exact things, all at once, at the same time? Freaky stuff...good thoughts though, you know that saying..'great minds' what? lol..
Always,
MendingTheSurface
|
|
Posted by MendingTheSurface
on 2007-12-14 13:14:46
|
|
|
|
|
|
Blog Information
|
| |
Apexs
United Kingdom
|
Apexs's Links
|
|
|
No links found
|
| Blog Categories |
|
|
Nothing found
|
|
Comment Archives |
|
No comments found |
|
|
|
|
|
