its amazing how things can change in a matter of just 5 years.
you lose a lot, you gain a lot, you experience a lot, and you learn a hell of a lot more than you do any thing else.

since I began my life in Dyersburg

I have lost my first love,
my second love
and the guy that I loved everything about or thought I did.
the trust of my mom,
trust for a friend,
self control,
dignity,
love,
and friends.

and those are just the good things I lost

the bad things:

self inflicted scars,
heart ach,
emptiness,
loneliness,
desperatism,
Love
And Enemies.


I have gained
a brother,
two step-brothers,
a sister-in-law,
two nephews,
a niece,
a cousin,
a god son,
a couple new friends,
love,
self control,
The trust of my mom,
Trust for a friend,
And Dignity,

And those are just the good things.

Its funny because the bad things I gained are the things that I also lost and they are the things that I experienced too.

I gained, lost, and experienced :
self inflicted scars,
heart ach,
emptiness,
loneliness,
desperatism,
Love.

What I have learned from everything that I have lost, gain, and experienced is that if you are fully dedicated to having a happy life then it will happen. But you have to work for it and not  let anything stand in your way.

I am happy to say that I have gained more good than bad, but I have not lost more bad than good. I have lost more good than bad. But life isn’t over yet and I have no intension in letting the list of good things I’ve lost get bigger.