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it ain't fun getting good

   a moment for joseph. for those who aren't familiar with the Biblical account of his story, you may have heard music from "Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat." much ado is made of his brothers' jealousy. his brothers knew something current storytellers don't. the coat joseph got was the type given to future royalty. it was cutting enough to be joseph's older brother and see the mantle of royalty given to the kid. kinda like being michael jackson's older brother. perhaps joseph would have been tolerable if he had shut the heck up. young joe went back not once, but twice, with dreams that rubbed his brothers' face in it. the centuries have been very unkind to joseph's brothers and the apostle thomas, who silly people call doubting thomas but who ended up being one of the greatest evangelists of all history. what doesn't get discussed is how well the brothers of joseph dealt with their feelings of betrayal until joseph started having the dreams. joseph had something wrong with him that would have made him a horrible leader. it is called self-centeredness. at this point his brothers actually become God's agents.

   the sermons tend to describe the next few steps of the story as the unfair treatment of poor joseph. fried bologna. braggart joseph. this man is destined to run the most powerful nation on the block and save many nations by conservation before there was an environmental protection agency. that requires more vision than joseph had when he was going, "look at me, look at me." it took being falsely accused and jailed to break his pride. the seed must be crushed to free the plant to grow. when i was working with drunks, i visited one in jail. i said, "did ya do it?" and his reply surprised me. he said, "brother johnny, i did not. but i did so many things that i didn't get caught for, i figured i owed God this one." i said, "my friend, you are ready to stay sober when you get out of here." he did. for the rest of his life. joseph didn't deserve to be broken. he wasn't a bad guy trying to get good. he was a proud boy needing to get humble.

   thirty years ago i asked to be humbled. i wanted to be worthy of serving Him. i have had a few wives walk out. i was top producer out of 350 brokers and VP over the top office in the firm. overnight i was making less than poverty level. out of over 5000 kids i have counseled, my favorite of all time committed suicide. his parents told me not to come to his funeral. according to them, i failed him. he was picked up driving drunk and hung himself in his cell. but it was my fault. i offended the cousin who was my best friend for years and she no longer speaks to me. i used to buy rounds for the club when my band was playing. now i can't afford diet coke. so i asked, "Lord, why am i getting so slammed?" and He said, "remember asking for humility?" i said i did. He said, "the slamming is directly proportional to the amount of humility you don't have yet." oops.

   God is fair. period. it is not God Who abuses children or spouses. it is not God Who "allows" children to suffer with disease. "but john, how could a God of love blah, blah, blah?" if it ain't love, it is probably human. we like to blame the devil, but we have made him lazy. you see, alcoholics may not be so much more self-centered than other folks. great brain power has been used to find excuses for almost every act of selfishness. and most of our ills come from selfishness. w. said the only people he listens to are his wife and his dog. wonder which one said, "give America away to a country that means nothing." but look at the cost of w's selfishness. if he knows what he is doing, he is purely evil. if he doesn't, he is an idiot. and he is the most powerful man in the free world? actually, i am one of the very few free men i know. i died three times. i know what's coming. and it is more peaceful than i can describe. there is no fear when you get there. i would be surprised if they don't discover that God built in a chemical to be released when it is time to die that is more calming than the best cannabis. it is hard to fear men if you have no fear of death.

   if you ask for a kingdom job, remember training. as a young believer i actually asked for Billy Graham's position when he retired. no ego there, huh? i had no foundation for that kind of job. but the reality of my position is that if i had known what i needed to go through to get there, i might have politely refused. looking back, i am grateful for every bruise, heartbreak and disappointment. but if i had seen them going in, ain't hap'nin'. joseph got the training he needed in jail. no more no less. i don't know the answers yet about suffering children and all that. but i know that when you realize your calling, the school of God is included in the plan. He will mold you as He needs to in order to fit your gift. i will get there one day. thanks for stopping.