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I'm going out with my boyfriend to dinner tonight. Today is my last day of binging as tomorrow I'm going to begin a juice fast for at least a week. I am disgusted and ashamed of myself after consuming a sugary, fat-ladden breakfast which now causes me to yawn excessively and contemplate going back to bed. I am glad I have the weekend off. I'm going to need to take it relatively easy tomorrow as my body will be deprived of all food.

This evening, I will spend extra time on my appearance, hoping to avert the judging eyes away from my body. People say I have a pretty face. "You'd be gorgeous if only you lost weight." I won't forget those words. When you work at a health club facility, you can't get away from it, and you certainly have no excuse for being overweight. So, shame on me! Members must be appalled watching my uniforms change from stylish to frumpy in a 6 month period. I'm being treated on the different end of the spectrum now. Women seem to be nicer (in a condescending way) toward me and men look past me as if I didn't exist. I have a boyfriend who I absolutely love, but it's nice to know if you are still attractive to the opposite sex, and apparently I surpassed the weight limit.

I will make my comeback. I am determined and will go to the extremes to get there. Like I always do.